


The Lake House

by disturbedbydesign



Category: Marvel Avengers Movies RPF
Genre: Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-23
Updated: 2012-12-23
Packaged: 2017-11-22 03:52:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 33,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/605523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disturbedbydesign/pseuds/disturbedbydesign
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sara and Tom have been friends for a long time, but they have a past, and there's some unfinished business that needs taking care of.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The _Avengers Assemble_ premiere was starting in a little over an hour and Sara was so excited she could barely stand it. It seemed like a lifetime since she’d seen Tom and she was nearly sick with missing him. He had been so busy filming here, there, and everywhere that he hadn’t been back in London for more than a day or two in nearly a year, and those one or two times when he had come home, she had been away doing research for her debut novel. As excited as she was just to see him, she was more excited to give him a copy of the book so she could get his thoughts. Her novel was receiving some critical praise, but – as it had always been since their days together at Cambridge – Tom’s opinion was the only one that mattered to her.

 

Sara and Tom had been the closest of friends since the first day they met at university – on the first of many late nights at the library. She didn’t have any friends when she first arrived at Cambridge from New York, and when she bumped into Tom in the library, she thought to herself that he had the kindest eyes she had ever seen – and such a gentleman. It was midnight and the library was closing and, since she was alone and carrying what felt like a thousand books, he offered to walk her back to her room and lighten her load. Sara would never forget that night as long as she lived. It was pitch-black and the sky hung heavy with stars. The night air was lovely and brisk, refreshing and filled with promise, and her stroll with Tom was filled with talk of music and literature and art and theater, punctuated with laughter and just the tiniest bit of flirtation.

 

He was charming, witty, and quite possibly the most eloquent and intelligent man she had ever met. Sara could have walked with him forever, listening to that velvet-smooth voice and that funny little giggle of his – one moment talking about the world’s great philosophers and writers and the profundity of human life, and the next cracking a dirty joke and flashing a devilish grin. When they reached her door, Tom carried her things inside and – ever the Shakespeare dork – said, “a thousand times good night!” Sara laughed and thanked him, and she couldn’t help but smile at how adorable he was. They made plans to meet up for drinks so Tom could introduce her to some of his friends.

 

“A woman of your beauty and intelligence shouldn’t waste away alone in a library,” he had said. “That’s practically criminal.”

 

When he left and she shut the door behind her, Sara had felt truly happy for the first time since she had arrived at school, if slightly confused by her feelings for this man she had only just met. Being a heterosexual woman with a pulse, she was obviously attracted to him – those soul-piercing eyes, those blonde curls, that smile that could light up the darkest night – but there was so much more to it than that. She had finally found someone she could see becoming a true friend and confidant – someone whose intellect she admired and whom she felt she could talk to for hours about anything and everything. And as lonely as she was then, a true and meaningful friendship was the most important thing she could think of. She slept soundly that night, dreaming of sitting with Tom by a lake somewhere in the countryside, talking and laughing and nothing else. 


	2. Chapter 2

“Oh for fuck’s sake!” Sara screamed, her frustrations echoing throughout the walls of her irreparably messy flat. “WHERE ARE YOU?”

 

She was supposed to be at the premiere in 45 minutes, but she was still futzing around her bedroom in a towel, hair dripping wet, looking for her green dress amongst the detritus of clothes and books and random scribblings strewn across her bedroom floor. Sara had always been a complete slob, and it had never bothered her until this very moment. She needed the green dress. Tom loved that green dress.

 

“I will fucking find you if it is the last thing I do.”

 

Sara caught herself, snarling aggressive threats to inanimate objects, and took a moment to laugh at how profoundly ridiculous she was. That’s when she saw it, poking out from under a stack of Fitzgerald novels and lit criticism journals she had used for her research.

 

“Gotcha.”

 

Sara dropped her towel and pulled the dress out from under the pile. Since she couldn’t wear a bra with the dress, which was backless and floor-length, she grabbed only a skimpy black lace thong out of her lingerie drawer and headed to the bathroom. She slipped on her panties and managed to shimmy her way into the dress, which was tight when she got it years ago but was now straining against the more curvaceous figure she had acquired since her early 20s. Sara was two sizes larger now than she had been when she met Tom, but luckily for her she had expanded in all the right places. She had quite the hips and ass now, and she had gone from a solid B-cup to a more than ample C. Hardly anything to complain about. But being in her thirties, she knew the secret was to keep fit. After her break-up with Ed, and especially knowing that she would be attending the premiere, Sara had been hitting the gym and running and was looking and feeling the best she had in years. She felt tight in the right places and supple in the others. She finally felt sexy again, and she was ready to party.

 

She blew her hair dry then threw her copper waves up into one of those “this looks messy on purpose” hairstyles, and applied minimal makeup. She didn’t want to cover her faint, rosy freckles – Tom loved her freckles. She decided to go with a smoky eye to showcase her best feature – Kelley green eyes flecked with gold – which Tom had once told her he could happily drown in. She used a sheer lip gloss to puff up her pouty lips without losing their natural pink. In the end, though, it was all about earrings: sparkly, dangly masterpieces crafted from emeralds and gold that stopped just short of her shoulders. Gold and green. Loki’s colors.

 

She’d had them made special for the premiere, spending more of her advance than she should have. But when she slid the earrings on, and felt them graze her collarbones when she bent to slip on a pair of nude heels, she was consumed with excitement for the night ahead. She felt great. She looked great. She was about to see her best friend for the first time in a year and get one of those Tom hugs where it feels like his long, lean arms could wrap around you a thousand times and still have room left.

 

At the thought of that hug, Sara started to feel a familiar sensation and the memory of the lake house consumed her. For years she had tried to squash this feeling every time it surfaced. These thoughts, this feeling, could ruin everything. But for whatever reason on this day, looking at herself in the mirror and thinking of the laundry list of regrets she already had at the age of thirty, she didn’t care anymore. She didn’t try to stop it. She let it wash over her.

 

She looked in the mirror and grinned at herself mischievously. Heading for the door, she grabbed her gold clutch off the side table and went to pull her iPhone off the charger. When she went to check the time on her phone she saw she had received a text from Tom.

 

_Uncontrollably excited to see you. Wear green if possible. xx_

 

A naughty smile flashed across Sara’s face and she dashed out the door to grab a cab. 


	3. Chapter 3

The entire ride over to the premiere, she couldn’t shake the memories that had flooded back to her. The way his lips felt on her cold, goose-pimpled skin. The way his beautiful hands had held her face so gently. The sound of his whispers in her ear, which somehow he made sound both soft and savage. And his eyes. Oh, those fucking eyes. The way he looked at her – looked _through_ her, right to the deepest part of her soul. It was the best night of her life, but it had been so wrong.

 

After she had met Tom, everything changed. As promised, he had taken her to the pub for drinks and introduced her to his friends. She ended up getting along swimmingly with everyone – especially Anna. At the time, Anna had been dating one of Tom’s friends, and she and Sara instantly clicked. They had both grown up in America, their fathers were both British by birth, and they both felt slightly out of place at Cambridge despite the fact that they were technically citizens. Anna almost instantly became Sara’s best girlfriend, but the friendship the two women developed over the years was almost nothing compared to Sara’s connection with Tom.

 

Tom and Sara had talked almost non-stop that entire night, and after the pub closed, when everyone was sufficiently drunk and going their separate ways, Sara was feeling a bit cheeky. She turned to Tom, who was still wired like she was and loitering about trying to figure out what to do next.

 

“Fancy a nightcap?” she asked, and smiled.

 

“Oh,” he replied. “Oh, yes.”

 

“Well,” she said. “It’s your lucky night. I’ve got some really good scotch stashed away in my room.”

 

“You’ve read my mind, darling,” he replied with a smirk and one devilishly raised eyebrow.

 

Back in Sara’s room they drank together and talked and laughed. Sara put _The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan_ on the record player and Tom sang along and strummed away at his air guitar.

 

“I just love Bob Dylan,” he said, picking up the album sleeve. “His music is so simple yet soulful at the same time. There are so many layers to it. Absolutely brilliant.”

 

“You know,” she said, pointing at the album cover, “I could take you there. That photo was taken in the West Village. That street is about four blocks from where I live.”

 

Tom stared at her like she had just completely blown his mind.

 

“I would absolutely love that!” he said. “And you know, I’ve never been to New York.”

 

“Then it’s settled,” Sara replied. She was starting to slur her words, but in Tom’s company, even though she’d only just met him, she really didn’t care. “We are going to New York. You are coming home with me. We are taking a picture of ourselves on Jones Street just like Bob and Suze. And you will keep it forever.”

 

They both burst into a fit of laughter – Tom giggling _EHEHEHE_ while throwing his head back and poking his tongue through his perfect teeth, Sara cackling like some evil Shakespearean witch. And although she had been drunk and only half-serious when she suggested the trip, somehow Tom and Sara both knew that one day they would go there.

 

They knew it was time to call it a night when Sara’s neighbor started banging furiously on the door. And while her neighbor had always been an annoying, uptight bitch, she did have a point. It was 4 in the morning, the music was excessively loud, and they both had early classes.

 

“Get out,” Sara said. “You’re gonna get me in a heap of trouble with that one.”

 

“What can I say?” Tom replied. “Wherever I go, mischief seems to follow.”

 

He flashed her an adorkable smile and left. By the time Sara got into bed, her mind was racing. She didn’t know if it was from all the booze or from Tom, or a little bit of both. She fell asleep and dreamt of being back home in New York – only it didn’t feel like home anymore because something was missing.


	4. Chapter 4

The cab hadn’t moved more than a few feet for the past five minutes and Sara was growing even more anxious. She was supposed to have been there already and, despite the fact that she was wearing uncomfortably high heels, she knew at this point her only option was to get out and finish the journey on foot. She paid the driver and exited the cab, cursing her shoe choice after only half a block. By the time she arrived at the outskirts of the red carpet area, she could feel the blisters already formed.

 

“Well, this evening is starting out swimmingly,” she thought to herself as she rummaged around her purse looking for her ticket. Her clutch purse was small and it took her less than a minute to realize that it wasn’t there.

 

“No. No no no no no no. This isn’t happening. This is SO not happening,” she said aloud – probably too loud. Sara had a bad habit of talking to herself, completely oblivious to her surroundings. “FUCK.”

 

A few random heads turned after she screamed her obscenity and felt her face flush.

 

“Sorry,” she said to no one in particular, and dug out her phone. She knew texting Tom would be pointless as he would be in the middle of red carpet interviews, so she scrolled through her contacts desperately hoping that she had put Tom’s publicist’s number in there. Thankfully, “Luke Windsor mobile” popped up and she frantically started texting.

 

_Hi Luke – this is Tom’s friend Sara. I know we haven’t met yet so it is especially embarrassing to have to admit that I am a complete idiot and can’t find my ticket. Loitering outside, don’t know what to do – please help if you can! So sorry about this._

 

She hit send, completely mortified that Luke’s first impression of her was going to be that of a complete flake inconveniencing him in the middle of a huge premiere. She wasn’t exactly sure why she cared what he thought of her, but she did. She had been excited to meet Luke since she knew that he and Tom had grown close since they started working together, but now she just felt like an ass. As she waited for a response, she tried to get a look at the red carpet and catch a glimpse of Tom, but even in 3-inch heels she was only 5’6” and she was so far back that she couldn’t see a thing. Finally, after what seemed like hours, her phone buzzed in her hand.

 

_Sara – don’t worry. Tell me where you are and I’ll send someone to fetch you. – L._

 

She typed in her location and waited. After a few minutes, she was shocked to see Luke himself pushing his way through the crowd towards her. She recognized him from photos, as he was always by Tom’s side. She called out his name and waved her arms around frantically, knowing that she probably looked like a crazy person, but she needed to make sure he knew who he was looking for since he had never met her. He smiled when he saw her and she could see him laughing a little as he made his way over, which in her mind confirmed that he thought she was a complete fool. Sara had never felt more embarrassed in her entire life.

 

“I’m Sara,” she said, wanting to find the nearest rock, crawl under it, and die. Luke just laughed.

 

“I know who you are,” he said. “Tom is constantly going on about you and I think at this point I must have seen every photo of you ever taken.”

 

Sara felt her face flush. Why would Tom be showing him pictures of her? And who else is he showing them to?

 

“Well I hope he has told you good things,” she said, “as I’ve clearly not made the best impression in person. I am so so so sorry about this, by the way. I know you were right in the thick of things. I can’t believe you actually came out to get me yourself – thank you so much.”

 

“Sara, relax. It’s fine,” he said. “Tom asked me to come get you myself while he finished up his interviews. He was worried about you and anticipated you’d be a bit frazzled.”

 

“Well,” she said. “He was right, as always. Shall we? I’ve taken up enough of your time with my idiocy already.”

 

Luke guided her through the crowd toward the VIP entrance, where he explained the situation to the security personnel. They were surprisingly accommodating and breezed her right through– a perk of Tom’s celebrity she had yet to experience. Sara was never one to buy into the cult of celebrity, but she found herself completely turned on by the VIP treatment she was getting as Tom’s friend.

 

Once through the security gauntlet, Luke handed her a pass and told her where to go.

 

“Alright,” he said. “I’ve got to get back to Tom and make sure he actually gets inside. You know him – he will just talk and talk. I’ll bet he’s still talking to the same reporter he was talking with when I left.”

 

Sara laughed, certain that what Luke said was probably true.

 

“It was nice to finally meet you, Sara,” he said. “I’ve got your number now so I’ll text you when Tom has time to meet up and let you know where to go.”

 

Sara thanked him, but she couldn’t help but feel disappointed. The whole thing just seemed so impersonal, but she caught herself in her silliness. After all, she was nobody. She didn’t actually expect to walk the red carpet with Tom at his movie premiere. She started to walk in the direction Luke had pointed her when out of the corner of her eye she saw a tall figure striding toward her. She turned and saw Tom, picture perfect in his tuxedo and smiling ear to ear. Before she knew it he was on her, his arms enveloping her and a thousand flashes going off as the paparazzi snapped photo after photo of Tom Hiddleston with some mysterious, unknown woman.

 

He pulled out of the hug and held out her arms, looking her up and down as if drinking in the sight of her. He ever so subtly bit his lower lip and flashed her a one-sided smile. She had seen that look before, at the lake house, and she knew exactly what it meant – and what it did to her.

 

“You, my dear, look ravishing,” he said. His voice was deep and smooth like honey. “We’d better get inside and in our seats before Luke has my head.”

 

“Our seats?” Sara asked. She had assumed she would be sitting in some random corner.

 

“Well yes of course our seats,” he said. “Don’t be daft. Like I’d want to sit with anyone else. I’ll have Luke switch some things around. Come on, let’s go.”

 

Tom placed one hand on the small of her bare back, his long fingers applying just the right amount of pressure to guide her through the crowd, and his touch sent a shockwave through her whole body. She felt a familiar tingling and a dampness down below as she made her way toward the entrance on Tom’s arm. Sara felt like everyone was staring at her – at them – wondering who the hell she was. But she didn’t care. The only thing she could think about was that she had never, in her thirty years on Earth, been more aroused. 


	5. Chapter 5

In the darkened theater, Sara tried desperately to focus on Avengers Assemble. She was absolutely loving it – everyone’s performances were flawless, the story was amazing (and so funny!), and the special effects were mind-blowing. It was just simply a fantastic movie, and it was still only about 45 minutes in. But she couldn’t help but be distracted.

Sitting so close to Tom she could feel the heat coming off him and smell his distinct aroma – a combination of the light, musky cologne he always wore and his own personal manly scent. That smell was driving her absolutely crazy. He was making it almost impossible for her to concentrate on the screen, sitting there with his long legs spread apart, taking over half of her leg room and half of Luke’s on the other side. Tom’s leg was brushed up against hers and she could feel his lean muscular thigh through his trousers. And then there was that familiar bulge between his legs. Sara tried hard not to look in his direction, but she couldn’t help but sneak a quick side glance at his crotch before directing her attention back to the film.

She heard a low but unmistakable “Ehehehe” in the darkness and she knew he had caught her looking. She was thankful for the dim lighting because she could feel her face blushing beet-red. She resisted the urge to bury her face in her hands and laugh at her own stupidity, staring straight ahead and refusing to look over at Tom even though she could feel him looking at her, waiting for a response. She was determined not to give him one – to play it off like she had no idea. But then she felt his hand on her leg, first at the knee and then slowly inching up to rest on her mid-thigh. He gave her a firm squeeze and she finally turned to look at him. Even in the dark, she could see the lust in his eyes and she felt herself throbbing and wet again. She turned away from him and closed her eyes for a moment, inhaling deeply and trying to regain her composure.

She stared blankly at the screen for the rest of the movie, but her mind was a world away. While Manhattan was being invaded by Loki’s army on-screen, Sara’s mind was telling its own New York story – one that started on the cobbled streets of the West Village and ended upstate, at the lake house.


	6. Chapter 6

The final months of their last year at Cambridge had been hard on Tom and Sara. By the end, just about the only thing keeping them going was the knowledge that, once they got through it all, they were finally going to take that trip to New York. Like everyone else, they had been overloaded and half crazy with their studies, and on top of that stress, both of them were struggling in failing relationships.

It was a slightly sordid situation – the kind of weirdly incestual partner-swapping that only happens at university. Ed and Anna had been dating when Sara first met them at the pub in her first year, but their relationship didn’t last more than a few months and they were split by the time summer came. Despite the fact that he and Ed were good friends, Tom and Anna started dating about a year and a half after the break-up. Not long after that, Sara started dating Ed. There was underlying tension at times, but the group of friends and lovers managed to carry on, leaving the past in the past – at least on the surface. Anna remained Sara’s best girlfriend, despite the fact that she was dating her ex, and Sara and Tom’s friendship only grew closer and stronger over the years. 

Sara and Ed had always had an odd, tempestuous relationship. Ed was a hot-tempered guy, and Sara was the kind of woman who really knew how to push a man’s buttons. They were notorious for breaking up and making up. When they were broken up, they would fuck other people but continue to spend time together as if nothing was wrong. Then they would inevitably get back together without much ado. It was just the nature of their relationship, and both of them were fine with it. Tom and Anna had a more functional relationship, at least for the first year or so. They were committed to each other and very much in love, but after a while Anna began to change. She became possessive and jealous, and would pick fights with him in public – something that Tom absolutely abhorred. He wasn’t the type of guy to anger easily, but when he did it was explosive. The last few months at school, with all the stress of his studies and the uncertain future looming after graduation, Anna brought that side of him out on many occasions.

Tom finally reached his breaking point the night before graduation. They had all planned one last night out at the pub together, despite the fact that Sara and Ed were “off” at the time. Sara and Ed had arrived first and spent an hour and a half drinking and swapping good-natured insults while waiting for Tom and Anna, who were very late. It was very unlike Tom to be late without calling or texting and Sara was starting to get legitimately concerned. Ed, characteristically concerned only with himself, was off cruising for a piece of ass to take home when Tom finally burst through the door and slammed himself down on the bar stool next to Sara. 

“Scotch,” Tom said, looking at Sara. “Now.” His face was flushed and he had fire in his eyes.

“Jesus. OKAY,” she replied and flagged down the waitress. “What the fuck is wrong with you, Tom? And where’s Anna?”

“I don’t know and I don’t care,” he said. “We’re through. I’ve had it. SCOTCH!”

“You need to stop yelling,” she said. “I don’t feel like getting booted from the pub tonight. I’m not nearly drunk enough. Now calm down and just tell me what happened.”

“I’m sorry I yelled at you, Sara,” he said. “Really, I am. But I can’t talk about it right now. I just can’t.”

Tom looked like he was either about to burst into tears or put his fist through a wall. Sara was dying to know what had happened but she didn’t want to push it since he was obviously on the verge of a total breakdown. She knew he would tell her eventually. They told each other everything.

“It’s okay,” she said, trying to soothe him with her voice. “We don’t have to talk about it. We don’t have to talk at all. Let’s get you that drink.”

Tom’s scotch arrived and he ordered another before even touching the first. Sara ordered another pint and the two sat in silence for a while, but it wasn’t awkward since the two were so close they didn’t feel the need to fill every silence with words. Sara watched him staring intently into his glass, swirling it before each sip and fingering the rim while his mind wandered. 

“So where’s good ol’ Ed?” Tom asked, breaking the silence.

“Oh, he’s off flirting with the big-titted waitress,” she said, laughing. “He’s trying to go out with a bang, so to speak.”

Tom let out a disgusted sigh. “I will never understand your relationship.”

“That’s okay,” Sara said. “I will never understand it either.”

They looked at each other and burst into an uncontrollable fit of laughter which continued as Ed finally made his way back to the table.

“What did I miss?” Ed asked. “Where’s Anna?”

Sara shot Ed a look that said “Don’t go there” but it was too late. 

Tom heaved a sigh and said, “We’re through. She’s lost it, just gone absolutely mad and I can’t take it anymore.” He upended his glass and gulped down the rest of his drink. “And if it’s all the same to you, I’d rather not get into it.”

“Sure thing, mate,” Ed replied, raising his glass in the air. “To women: the root of all the world’s evils.” He gulped down half his beer and looked at Sara with a satisfied smirk on his face.

Sara just rolled her eyes. “You know I hate you, right?”

“Of course,” Ed replied. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

And with that Ed took off after the waitress and left Tom and Sara alone again at the table. Tom was starting to look like his usual self. He was half smiling as he buried his head in his palm, shaking his curly-haired head at Ed’s misogynistic idiocy. He looked up at Sara, no trace of rage left in his blue eyes, and leaned in close.

“Now,” Tom said. “Let’s talk about something happy, shall we? I am so excited for our New York trip. I mean, I was excited before, but now…” He trailed off. “Well, I really can’t think of anything on earth I’d rather do than get the hell out of this place and go on holiday with you.”

Sara smiled. “I think that would make a much better toast, don’t you?” She raised her glass and Tom raised his. 

“To New York!” she said.

“To you and me in New York,” he corrected her.


	7. Chapter 7

Tom and Sara caught a red-eye from London a few days after graduation. Giddy with excitement, the two talked non-stop for the first few hours of the flight. Tom was like a wide-eyed child, filled with questions about all the places they had planned to visit. Sara had agreed to do some of the more touristy stuff with him even though, as a native New Yorker, she really had no interest, but Tom was too adorably excited about everything that she kept that fact to herself. Besides, everything was always more fun with Tom by her side, and his enthusiasm was infectious. If there was anyone that could get her to actually enjoy a visit to Times Square, it was him. 

Sara was more excited about showing Tom “her” New York – all her favorite little nooks and crannies of the city, the hole-in-the wall restaurants that served the best food. But more than anything, she was excited for the little surprise she had planned for him. Sara’s parents had been supporters of the Shakespeare in the Park program for years and had easily secured two tickets to that summer’s production of Twelfth Night. It had taken all the willpower Sara could muster not to blurt out the secret – especially after having a few drinks on the plane – but she managed to keep it under wraps. She knew that the look on Tom’s face when she finally told him would be worth it.

Sara didn’t remember falling asleep but when she woke to the sound of the pilot’s announcement that they were about an hour outside JFK, she found herself wrapped in a blanket with Tom, who was still sleeping soundly with his head resting on her shoulder and one arm lightly hugging her midsection. She couldn’t help but smile when she looked at him. He looked so peaceful, like an angel – so unlike how he had been for the past few weeks. She was happy he was finally his usual, happy self again – finished with school and free from Anna. Sara still hadn’t gotten the full story of their break-up from him, but she figured he would tell her at some point during the trip. 

As much as she hated to wake him, she really had to use the bathroom. She lightly tapped his arm under the blanket and whispered in his ear.

“Get up, sleepyhead, we’re almost there.”

It took him a moment to register where he was and what was happening and Sara laughed at how completely befuddled he looked when he realized he had fallen asleep wrapped around her.

“I’m so sorry. I seem to have inadvertently molested you in the night,” he said, shifting back fully into his own seat.

Sara just laughed. “It’s fine. You’re very comfortable. Like a teddy bear. Besides, how could you possibly have fit all 6 feet of you in your own seat?”

“6 foot 2,” he said, with a self-satisfied smile.

“I stand corrected,” she said. “And speaking of standing, I really have to go to the bathroom. Do you mind?”

“Not at all, my dear. I could use a stretch as well.”

Tom exited their row and stood in the aisle while she squeezed past. He did a catlike stretch, his full frame filling the space all the way to the ceiling, and as he lifted his arms his t-shirt rose up, revealing the tight muscles of his lower abdomen just above his jeans. Sara couldn’t resist poking his bare tummy and he snapped back, giggling EHEHEHE as he swatted her hand away.

“Sorry,” she said. “Couldn’t help it. You’re not the only one who gets to do the molesting.”

“That seems like a fair exchange,” he said. “Now hurry up to the loo, we have plans to discuss.”

Sara made a quick trip to the lavatory, splashed some water on her face to wake up a bit, and headed back to their row. They decided they would need to see how they felt once they arrived at Sara’s house, but that most likely they would just brew a huge pot of coffee and jump right into things. Since it would be around dinnertime when they got there, Sara had a feeling her parents would insist on taking them out to a nice meal. Even though they had only just met him the once at graduation, Sara’s parents were enamored with Tom, and Sara knew they would not be taking no for an answer when it came to a welcome dinner – no matter how jetlagged the two were.

The flight attendant’s voice came over the PA, announcing their descent to JFK, and Tom stared wide-eyed and open-mouthed out the window as the city came into view. Sara had let him have the window seat for the end of the flight, wanting to watch him watching the New York City skyline unfold beneath him. Seeing him that way, Sara felt a surge of energy fueled by excitement for the week that lay ahead of them. She thought to herself that she might not even need that coffee after all. Just being with Tom in New York, taking everything in, would give her all the pep she needed.

As expected, the moment they arrived at Sara’s brownstone, her parents began fawning over Tom and insisted on a fancy dinner. Although she would have preferred something a bit more low key, Sara knew any objections to this plan would fall on deaf ears, so she just went with it even though it required her to wear nice clothes and all she wanted was to slip on a fresh pair of jeans and a t-shirt. Tom pulled her aside. He looked embarrassed.

“I don’t think I’ve packed anything upscale to wear I’m afraid.”

Without even thinking Sara responded, “Just wear the blue button down and your khaki trousers with the brown belt.”

Tom smiled.

“I didn’t know you had such an in-depth knowledge of my wardrobe.”

“Tom, you own like 5 articles of clothing. It wasn’t much of a stretch. Just go get dressed so we can get this over with and get to the fun stuff.”

Despite Sara’s misgivings, dinner ended up being lovely. Her parents were absolutely glowing with pride for the both of them having finished school and they treated Tom like he was part of the family. Sara’s father was especially fond of Tom, and the two of them bonded over their shared British heritage. They ordered bottle after bottle of wine and ate far too much food, and by the time dinner was over Sara and Tom were buzzed and needing to walk off their dinner. As they were exiting the restaurant, Sara’s mother turned to her.

“Oh, sweetheart, I almost forgot – I have a surprise for you both! Now, I know that this is Tom’s first visit to the city and I’m sure he will want to take in all the sights, but I went ahead and readied a car to take you up to the lake house on Friday. I thought you might want to get Tom out of the city for a night and show him that the New York area isn’t all concrete and skyscrapers. Besides, we’re going to have a heat wave hit later this week and I can’t imagine that the smell of garbage baking in 90 degree heat is something he’ll be able to stand for more than a day or two.”

Tom looked pleased and grateful.

“That sounds absolutely lovely. Thank you so much. You didn’t have to go to all that trouble on my account, really I….”

“Nonsense,” Sara’s mother cut him off. “It’s no trouble at all.”

Sara was a bit taken aback by the surprise, as she hadn’t planned for an overnight upstate, but she saw how pleased Tom looked and she decided it would be nice to get up there for a night. Sara had always loved the lake house and spent many summers there as a child. She figured if she wanted to show Tom “her New York,” that the lake house would make a pleasant addition. Besides, a New York summer heat wave spent in the city was never a pleasant experience and she wanted Tom to come away from the trip as relaxed and happy as possible given all he had gone through in the past few months.

“Mom, that sounds wonderful,” she said. “Thank you.”

Sara’s parents departed and Tom and Sara were left alone to wander the nighttime streets of New York.

“The lake house was a nice surprise,” Tom said. “Your parents are so gracious.”

“Yes well my parents love you. I’m fairly convinced at this point that they want us to get married so that you can be their son-in-law.”

Sara had been joking around with that last comment, but Tom put his long arm around her as they made their way back to the brownstone.

“I can think of worse things,” he said, and smiled.


	8. Chapter 8

The first two days of the trip had been jam-packed with outings all over the city. They hit the top of the Empire State Building, Rockefeller Center, the Met, the Guggenheim, the Museum of Natural History, the Statue of Liberty, and, of course, Times Square. Sara understood it was a “must-see” but she couldn’t bear the herds of people and the glaring lights for more than ten minutes without wanting to scream. She was beyond happy that Tom was content to just take a few pictures and get out of there.

“Well, that was a bit much!” he said as they were heading towards the 1 train to pop back down to the Village.

“I know. I hate Times Square, but I didn’t have the heart to tell you.”

Tom smiled. “Well, you are a very gracious host, darling.”

“I try. Now let’s get the fuck out of here before I murder the next person that slams into me without saying sorry.”

“Lead and I shall follow,” he said. “Where to next?”

After all the running around they had done, Sara was in desperate need of a shower and a change of clothes. It had been hot as hell all day and she felt like a disgusting mess.

“I want to go back to the house and clean up before dinner, if you don’t mind. I feel absolutely filthy.”

“That sounds like an excellent idea. I could probably benefit from a washing as well. Your mother wasn’t kidding about this heat wave.”

“Oh, we haven’t even gotten the worst of it yet,” Sara said. “I am so glad we’re escaping to the lake for a night. I’m already sick of summer in the city and I’ve been back for three days.”

“Such a jaded New Yorker,” Tom said and shook his head in mock disapproval. “Now let’s get going. We both must smell ghastly, but I can’t tell over the stench of exhaust fumes and garbage.”

“Welcome to New York, sweetheart.”

After a brief sojourn at the house to freshen up, they grabbed a cab to Chinatown to Sara’s favorite Chinese restaurant. The place didn’t look like much from the outside (or the inside for that matter) – it was shabby and tiny, with tables essentially on top of one another, and always crowded. Besides for the handful of in-the-know foodies, it was all neighborhood locals.

“You know the food at a Chinese place is good when Chinese people actually eat there,” she said as they were being seated. “We have to get the soup dumplings. They are amazing. There were nights back at school when I literally had dreams about them.”

Tom squeezed his long, lean frame into the tiny space between the table and the wall. “I’ve never had soup dumplings before but I trust you implicitly, and I am famished.”

When the food came Sara taught Tom how to properly eat a soup dumpling. 

“The trick is to put the dumpling on the spoon and then bite just a little hole in the top so that the steam from the inside can escape and you don’t completely scald your mouth when you eat it. I learned that the hard way.”

Tom followed her instructions, biting the top off the dumpling and blowing on the steamy opening with his perfect lips puckered into an O-shape. Sara started to laugh. He looked slightly ridiculous, but adorable as always.

“Oh no, what have I done? Am I doing it wrong?”

She tried to stifle her convulsive laughter so she didn’t drop the steaming hot dumpling off her spoon and into her lap but she couldn’t help it. “No, no you’re doing it right. It’s just that your face is priceless right now.”

“Well I’m glad I amuse you.”

“Always,” she said.

After dinner, both of them thoroughly satisfied, they decided to walk the few blocks over from Chinatown to the Lower East Side. Sara was never one for the overpriced drinks and hoards of self-important twentysomething investment bankers that frequented some of the more upscale bars and lounges in the city. She preferred shithole bars like the one they were headed to. It was the kind of place that had no sign, was located below street level down a flight of sketchy-looking stairs, and was completely dark except for the fluorescent signs behind the bar and the cheap votive candles on the tables.

Tom looked hesitant. “Are you sure you’re not taking me to a fight club or a sex dungeon or some such thing?”

“No, the sex dungeon is tomorrow night,” she said, and gave him a wink. “Come on. I need whiskey.”

She grabbed him by the arm and pulled him into the dark bar. They snagged the corner booth (Sara’s favorite spot) and she went over to greet Lindsay, the bartender, who knew her drink order even before she spoke a word.

“Jameson neat for you, I presume. And what can I get for that tall drink of water over in your booth?”

“Same,” Sara said.

“He’s pretty smokin’ hot. New boyfriend?”

“No, no. He’s just my good friend from school. My best friend, actually.”

Lindsay looked at her with doubting eyes. “Best friends. Riiiiiight. I’m sorry but there is no way in hell you’re not banging that guy.”

“Seriously, Linz, he’s just a friend. Can I have my fucking whiskey or do I have to jump back there and pour it myself?”

“Here you go, sugar. No need to get uppity. But I’ll tell you what – if you’re really not trying to tap that, you’re either an idiot or a lesbian, or both.”

“Thank you, Linz, for that shiny pearl of wisdom. I knew I came here for some other reason than the smell of stale beer and piss and the cheap drinks.”

“Don’t forget the music,” she said, smiling. “Any requests?”

“Zeppelin, Lindsay. Always Zeppelin.”

Sara took the drinks from the bar back to their table, where Tom was lounging with both arms outstretched and legs spread wide.

“Thomas, if you’re going to take up the entire booth, I’m drinking your whiskey.”

He giggled as he adjusted himself. “So sorry, love.” He patted the cracked, faux leather beside him. “Take a seat.”

“Ramble On” came blaring out of the speakers as she sat down and she threw her head back and let out a guttural “Yesssssss.”

“I see you’ve found your happy place,” Tom said, amused.

“All I need is whiskey and classic rock and I am a happy camper.”

“Cheers to that,” he said, and they clinked glasses, taking deep gulps of their whiskey and settling in for a night of drinking. 

A few rounds later, they were both silly drunk and Sara decided she couldn’t keep her secret any longer. 

“OK, OK so I have a surprise for you,” she said, bursting with excitement and fidgety in her seat. “Remember when you were talking about how badly you wanted to go to the theater while we were here and I told you that it would be impossible to get tickets to anything good?”

“Yes…. why?”

“Well, I lied.”

Sara could no longer physically contain her excitement and started bopping up and down in her seat and waving her arms as she blurted out, “I got us tickets to go see Shakespeare in the Park. Twelfth Night. Tomorrow night. I’m so excited I can’t even breathe. Are you excited? I’ve been holding this in for two months now and dying to tell you and it’s been KILLING me.”

Tom’s face positively lit up, and he was wide-eyed and open-mouthed in complete astonishment. Then a look of shock swept over him. He looked her deep in the eyes and stumbled with his words.

“I… I… I don’t even… Sara…”

He stopped trying to formulate a thought and instead reached over and gave her a long, deep hug, enveloping her in his arms and holding her wordlessly. When he finally pulled out of the hug, he held her by the shoulders and she could see he was tearing up the tiniest bit as he stared at her.

“Thank you. Really, thank you. From the bottom of my heart. This has always been a dream of mine. You have no idea how much this means to me.”

“Yes,” she said, pinching his cheek. “I do.”

Just then she heard the familiar opening riff of “Let’s Get It On” play over the speakers and she looked over Tom’s shoulder at Lindsay behind the bar. She was wearing a shit-eating grin and mouthed “TAP THAT ASS” as she made a lewd thrusting motion with her arms and hips. Sara was thankful that Tom had his back to her.

Tom got up abruptly. “Dance with me.”

Sara just stared at him. “You have got to be kidding me.”

“No, seriously. Dance with me. I love this song.”

“Thomas, you are drunk.”

“So are you. Now get your ass up off that booth and dance with me.”

He grabbed her hand and pulled her up, taking her in his arms and singing along with Marvin Gaye as she laughed and buried her head on his shoulder to hide her blushing face.

“Oh my God, Tom, you need to stop. Really. I can’t even deal with you right now.”

Tom just shook his head as he continued singing along and swaying her along with the music. Sara shrieked and laughed as he spun her around and dipped her, snatching her up quickly and spinning her around again. As Tom danced her around, she caught a glimpse of Lindsay who gave her a thumbs-up as she laughed her ass off behind the bar. Sara had to admit he was a really good dancer, and she soon got over her embarrassment and started getting into it and singing along with Tom, both of them drunkenly shouting the lyrics at the top of their voices. Everyone in the bar was staring, but neither of them cared. 

When the song ended, the bar erupted in shouts and applause punctuated by the two-fingered cat-call whistles that Lindsay was making from the bar. Sara was slightly mortified but Tom looked happy as a clam. She grabbed her glass off their table and pounded the few remaining sips in one gulp. 

“Well I think that’s as good a way as any to end the night,” she said.

“Are you tired, darling? Were my fantastic dance moves too much for you?”

He smiled wide, quite pleased with himself.

“I’m pretty sure it’s the copious amount of soup dumplings and whiskey catching up with me.”

“No, no I think not. It was definitely me. I’m too much for you to handle. It’s OK. You can admit it.”

“I can handle you just fine,” she said. “Let’s get a cab and head back. We should get a good night’s sleep so we can wander around Central Park tomorrow before the show.”

At the mention of the play, Tom’s demeanor changed and he took on a more serious affect.

“I just want to say… I don’t even know. I rarely find myself speechless…”

“Yes, I know. Seeing you at a loss for words is like finding a unicorn.”

Tom laughed. “I just don’t even know how to thank you properly – for the theater tickets, for all the adventures we’ve been on so far, for everything. I can honestly say I’ve never been so happy as I am right now.”

Now it was her turn to get choked up. “I’m happy when you’re happy,” she said, holding back the tear that was pooling at the corner of her eye. “And you deserve to be happy after all you’ve been dealing with. If I can play any part in that happiness, I’m glad to do it.”

A strange look flashed on Tom’s face when she had mentioned his recent troubles, but it was gone in an instant, and replaced with a gentle smile.

“Let’s get you home to bed,” he said. “I’ve got another day of running you ragged on tap for tomorrow.”

“Sounds good to me.”

Sara waved to Lindsay on her way out and was greeted with another lewd hand-to- mouth gesture she was happy Tom didn’t see. The night air felt pleasant against their drunk-flushed skin and they walked arm in arm down the street to hail a cab home. Sara didn’t remember closing her eyes in the cab but when she woke she was in her bedroom and Tom was gently draping her comforter over her. 

“How…?”

He raised a long finger to his lips as he brushed her hair away from her eyes. “Shhh. Go back to sleep. I’ll see you in the morning.”

He crept away and out the door, closing it silently behind him. Not wanting to sleep fully clothed but also too drunk to find something else to wear, she stripped herself naked and got back into bed. As soon as her head hit the pillow, she was out again.


	9. Chapter 9

Sara woke to a knock at her bedroom door. Her head was pounding in the aftermath of the previous evening’s indulgences and she was still only half awake. She was about to say “Hold on a sec” but her brain was not functional yet and she couldn’t get the words out in time. Tom opened the door and started to enter.

 

“Morning, darling, I thought you might need a cup of…. Oh my God, I’m so sorry.”

 

He quickly shut the door after walking in on her, completely naked on top of her crumpled bedding. She stumbled out of bed, threw on some sweatpants and a tank top, and opened the door to find Tom standing there, holding a mug of coffee and looking like he’d just been slapped across the face.

 

“I am so terribly sorry it’s just when I put you to bed last night you were fully clothed and I…”

 

Sara cut him off. “Oh, relax and hand over that coffee because I am hungover as shit.”

 

Tom handed her the mug and she took that first glorious sip that sliced her headache in half.

 

“Mmmm this is exactly what I needed. Thank you so much.”

 

“You are quite welcome,” he said. “Right, well I think I’ll go have a shower now.”

 

She caught just the slightest smile forming at the corner of his mouth as he walked off toward the guest room.

 

Sara returned to her room and glanced at the clock – 1:30 already. She hurried into the shower and readied herself for their day in Central Park. She was happy to find that her excitement for the evening’s Shakespeare outing, coupled with the coffee Tom had so thoughtfully brought her, was cutting through her hangover quite nicely. By the time she made her way to the kitchen she was feeling nearly 100% again. She was surprised to find the kitchen empty.

 

“Tom?”

 

She checked the living room and the library but he was nowhere to be found. She walked back down the hall towards the guest bathroom and was surprised to hear the shower still running. Tom usually took about ten minutes to get ready, start to finish, and it had been a little over half an hour since he set off to shower. She shrugged and returned to the kitchen, pouring herself another cup of coffee and perusing the _Times_ while she waited. Finally he popped in, curly blonde hair still wet.

 

“What the hell took you so long?”

 

He looked flustered. “I…um… I couldn’t decide what to wear.”

 

“You do realize I’m the girl, right?”

 

“Yes, yes, so sorry to have kept you waiting.” He quickly shifted the topic. “So, what’s the plan?”

 

“I say we head out and grab a few things for a picnic in the park and then just lay around or wander for a while until it’s time for the show – sound good?”

 

“Sounds perfect.”

 

After grabbing some provisions, they headed uptown and found a nice, shady spot in the park to settle in for a while. Tom was quieter than usual during their picnic lunch.

 

“Something wrong?” Sara asked.

 

“No, no. Everything is great. This is such a nice little spot. Just taking it all in, I suppose.”

 

“Yeah, I love to just come and just lay out and read. Speaking of which, did you bring something from the library?”

 

“Yes,” he said, and pulled _Twelfth Night_ out of his bag. Sara laughed.

 

“So you are going to sit here and read _Twelfth Night_ and then in a few hours, sit and watch _Twelfth Night_?”

 

“That is exactly what I plan to do, yes.”

 

“You are such a dork. I love you.”

 

“And I you,” he replied and dug in to Act I.

 

Sara, of course, had said “I love you” in that friendly way, but for some reason this time it felt strange to say those words out loud to him. She had said it a thousand times before in a thousand different circumstances, but today… She felt strange and awkward about it, but she quickly brushed it off. Tom obviously wasn’t fazed by it.

 

She sat with her back against the trunk of a large tree, reading _One Hundred Years of Solitude_ for the gazillionth time, but she wasn’t focused on it. She was replaying the events of last night and the morning in her head, and while she didn’t feel awkward around Tom – she could never feel awkward around Tom – she felt like there was something hanging in the air, something unsaid. And Tom still hadn’t told her what had happened with Anna. Her better judgment was screaming at her to stop but she couldn’t help herself.

 

“So, are you ever going to tell me what happened with Anna?”

 

Tom looked up from his book and turned to her. His face held a mixture of sadness and hesitation. He sighed deeply.

 

“Not now. Not today. I want today to be wonderful and I just… I don’t want to ruin it.”

 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

 

“No, no. I know you must think it strange I haven’t mentioned it but I… it’s just hard to talk about, Sara, especially to you.”

 

She was a bit taken aback – what the hell was that supposed to mean “especially to you”? But she let it go, feeling awful that she had broached the topic he clearly had no interest in discussing.

 

“It’s fine, Tom. When you’re ready to talk about it, I’ll be here. I don’t want to press you. I feel like a complete ass even having brought it up. It’s such a lovely day. I’ve ruined it now, haven’t I?”

 

“No, don’t be stupid. You haven’t ruined a thing. Tomorrow, Sara. I’ll tell you everything. I promise.”

 

She nodded in assent. He returned to Shakespeare and she to García Márquez, but both of their minds were somewhere else.

 

It was nearly 5:30 by the time they had decided to put their books away and take a stroll around the park grounds. They walked up the tree-lined Mall toward the northern end of the park, wandering the trails of The Ramble towards the Azalea Pond – Sara’s favorite spot in all of New York City.

 

“This is beautiful,” Tom said. “I don’t even feel like we’re in New York anymore.”

 

“That’s why it’s my favorite spot. I used to come here a lot when I felt like I need to escape.”

 

“Escape from what?”

 

“I don’t know – anything, everything.”

 

“Well I’m glad you showed me this. I would never have known this was here. You are just full of surprises, aren’t you?”

 

“What can I say? I like to keep you on your toes.”

 

They had a little over an hour before the show was set to start so they popped out at 77th Street and grabbed a quick bite. Tom was growing more and more excited as the start time approached and every few minutes his face would burst into an ear-to-ear smile.

 

“You’re like a little kid on Christmas morning right now.”

 

“I will admit that I am uncontrollably excited for this. I’m so happy you did this, although I am amazed that you were actually able to keep it a secret from me.”

 

“What, you think I can’t keep a secret?”

 

“I’m sure you can – from other people. But I can read you like a book and I had absolutely no idea. Maybe you should go into acting as well.”

 

“No, Thomas, I think you’ve got that bit covered. I will continue with my scribblings and end up waiting tables somewhere, plugging away at a novel no one will ever read.”

 

He grabbed her hand across the table and looked her straight in the eyes.

 

“Don’t say that,” he said, suddenly very serious. “I can’t stand when you speak about yourself that way. You have got to have more confidence than that. You know I believe in you. You need to believe in yourself.”

 

“Tom, it’s not that simple.”

 

“Actually, it is that simple. I’ve read your stories – the ones you’ll show me at least – and I’m sitting here now telling you that I think you are marvelous and I have all the faith in the world in you. We all doubt ourselves sometimes. I know I do. But you mustn’t be so negative. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”

 

“And how exactly do you see me, then?”

 

He took a moment to contemplate her before he spoke.

 

“I see an intelligent, witty, remarkable woman with something to say, something significant to contribute. I see someone who is passionate and full of life and bursting with creativity. And, if I may be so bold, quite easy on the eyes.”

 

He flashed her that devil grin of his and leaned back in his chair.

 

“I wish you could see that, Sara. But I know you don’t – at least not yet.”

 

“You’re right. I don’t. But thank you for saying that.”

 

“Well it’s true. You know I think the world of you. And I’ll tell you this – I am going to make it my mission to ensure that you never give up on your dreams. I want you to remember this day, because one day when you have achieved what you never thought you could, I am going to be there to remind you of this moment and say ‘I told you so.’”

 

Sara smiled at his kindness in spite of all her self-doubt. She had never heard that kind of praise from anyone in her entire life – not even from her parents, who had always been her biggest fans. She knew he meant every word he had said and she felt her heart swell with love for him at that moment. She made no attempt to try to define that love. It didn’t matter. All she cared about was that there was a person in her life who could make her feel the way he did, and she was so grateful for that she could have cried. She stared at him for a moment longer and then noticed the time on the wall clock behind him – 7:40, twenty minutes until show time.

 

“Shit, we gotta go, like, NOW.”

 

“Remember what I said, Sara.”

 

“I will. I promise. Now let’s go get our Shakespeare on.”

 

“There is nothing in this world I would rather do.”

 

They set off at a brisk pace back into the park towards the Delacorte Theater, both brimming with excitement. They were quickly seated in the third row (another perk of her parents’ support of the program is that they always got excellent seats) and Tom sat staring in awe at the open-air amphitheater. Belvedere Castle and the Turtle Pond formed the backdrop of the stage and looked even more magical bathed in the pink-orange light of the summer sky as the sun started its descent. Tom leaned in to her ear just as the play was about to begin.

 

“This is absolutely breathtaking,” Tom whispered. His breath tickled her earlobe as he grabbed her hand and gave it a grateful squeeze. “I will never in my life be able to thank you enough for this.”

 

As Orsino took the stage, she whispered back to him, “You already have.”

 

_If music be the food of love, play on…_

 


	10. Chapter 10

The morning Tom and Sara were set to leave for the lake house was hectic. The car was scheduled to pick them up at 9:30 for the four-hour drive up to Otsego and Sara was scrambling around trying to figure out what they needed to bring.

 

“Sara, there’s no need to run around crazy. The house is clean and ready, all the towels and bedding are clean, the dishes are done. Your father and I were up there a few weeks ago for Memorial Day and we left it spotless. Just stop in Cooperstown and pick up some food and you will be all set. You’re only there for one night for God’s sake.”

 

“OK, well that makes my life easier. How’s the liquor cabinet looking?”

 

“Well it’s probably a bit depleted after the Memorial Day party. You may want to add that to your to-do list.”

 

“Alright then, food and booze. I can handle that.”

 

“Is Tom awake yet? The car is going to be here in half an hour.”

 

“Good question. I’ll go check on him.”

 

Sara walked down the hall to the guest room and knocked on the door.

 

“Tom? You up yet?”

 

“Yes, darling, just a moment.”

 

Tom opened the door. He was dripping wet and wearing only a towel tied around his sculpted waist. He leaned against the doorframe and popped his head out.

 

“Am I running late? Your mother said 9:30.”

 

Sara found herself flustered and unable to speak for a moment. She knew he was in good shape but the sight of him wet and shirtless was proving to be too much for her to take. She found it almost impossible to keep herself from staring at the prominent hipbones that poked out just above the top of his towel, but she forced herself to look at his face.

 

“Are you feeling alright?” he asked.

 

“I… I’m fine. I just wanted to make sure you were up.”

 

“I am very much up and ready to go. One thing, though, love – I wasn’t really expecting to need swim trunks on this trip so I’m afraid I haven’t brought any.”

 

“Oh, don’t worry about that. My parents keep summer clothes and bathing suits up at the house and I’m sure my father won’t mind you borrowing a pair for the day.”

 

“Are you sure that will be alright?”

 

“Tom, I’m pretty sure my father would give you the shirt off his back if you needed it. It’s not an issue. But if you’re really that concerned I can ask.”

 

“I know it seems stupid but I would feel better about it if you did.”

 

Sara sighed and rolled her eyes.

 

“You know, sometimes you are annoyingly polite. He’s off to work already but I’ll ask my mom if you insist. Now put some clothes on and get your shit together, will you?”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Tom said. He smiled and shut the door.

 

Sara returned to her mother the kitchen and inquired about the bathing suit.

 

“Oh, Sara, really. He is just too darling for words. Of course your father won’t mind.”

 

“That’s what I told him but he insisted I ask permission first.”

 

“He is quite the gentleman for such a young man. Sometimes I just don’t understand you, Sara.”

 

“What is that supposed to mean?”

 

“Don’t play dumb with me, young lady. I see the way you two look at one another. And yet you carry on with that Ed, who I might add, is a complete ass and unworthy of my daughter’s affection.”

 

“Well I do have to agree with you about Ed, but he is out of the picture. But please, will you just stop with Tom? We are just friends. We have always been just friends. We will always be just friends. End of story.”

 

“Oh come on, sweetie. You are a beautiful, intelligent young woman, he is a handsome, charming young man. You obviously have a deep connection to one another. You mean to tell me that you two have never…”

 

“MOM! OH MY GOD, STOP. This conversation is officially over.”

 

“OK, OK. I will mind my own business.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Sara was relieved that her mother had stopped her grand inquisition by the time Tom made his way to the kitchen.

 

“A good morning to you, Mrs. Hughes.”

 

“Oh, Thomas, for the hundredth time, call me Alice.”

 

Sara’s mom smiled coyly at him and if Sara didn’t know better, she would think she was flirting like a schoolgirl. She made a mental note to make fun of her for it later.

 

“OK, then. Good morning, Alice.”

 

“Good morning, Tom. Sara has passed on your request for a pair of swim trunks and we are happy to oblige. There are plenty to choose from up at the house. And please make yourself at home.”

 

“Thank you, Mrs. – sorry. Thank you, Alice. Really, thank you for everything. You have all been such gracious hosts and I have had the most wonderful time. Truly.”

 

“It’s our pleasure, really. Will we be seeing you tomorrow before your flight home?”

 

“I certainly hope so. My flight doesn’t leave until late.”

 

“Wonderful. Charles and I will arrange a bon voyage dinner for tomorrow.”

 

“That would be lovely, thank you.”

 

A series of quick honks signaled to all that the car was ready and waiting. Tom dashed back to the guest room to grab his overnight bag and Sara’s mom turned to her and gave her a look like that said she was crazy not to be head-over-heels in love with that man.

 

“I hate you sometimes, Mom.”

 

“I love you always, sweetie. Have fun.”

 

Tom was back in an instant and the two headed to the door.

 

“Well I suppose we’re off. Thank you again,” Tom said, and waved goodbye. He turned to Sara and grabbed her bag from her hand. “Allow me. After you, darling.”

 

Sara looked back to wave goodbye to her mother, and was greeted with a wink and a knowing smile. Sara was happy to be walking in front of Tom because she knew she was blushing.

 

When they got down to the curb Sara saw that her parents’ definition of “car” was a bit different from hers. She was expecting a comfortable town car but idling curbside outside the brownstone she found a stretch limousine and suited driver waiting. Sara introduced herself and Tom to Alex, their driver, and told him they would be needing to make a stop in Cooperstown to grab some things.

 

“Anything you like, Ms. Hughes. And do let me know if you and Mr. Hiddleston would like to stop at any point before Cooperstown. Sir, may I take your bags for you?”

 

“Thank you so much, Alex,” Tom said, his gentlemanly tone masking the fact that he was slightly taken aback by the white-glove treatment they were receiving.

 

Sara felt embarrassed that her parents had splurged on such extravagant transportation. She leaned in to Tom.

 

“I can’t believe they did this. This is so unnecessary.”

 

“I think it’s lovely,” Tom said. “It’ll give us a bit more privacy on the drive up. I do have some explaining to do, after all.”

 

Sara realized he was finally ready to tell her what had happened with Anna, and her initial embarrassment turned to gratitude. She was even more grateful that they found the makings for mimosas chilling in the limo as they entered. From the way Tom had been acting and the cryptic comments he’d made, she had a feeling that one or the both of them might need a drink at some point during the drive.

 

They settled in for the long trip and, after asking whether they would like music or not, Alex closed the tinted barrier window. They had opted for some jazz.

 

“I think jazz goes well with mimosas, don’t you?” Sara said, pouring flutes for both of them.

 

“Jazz goes well with anything. Do I smell fresh-baked muffins?”

 

Sara looked toward a basket in the corner she hadn’t noticed before. Tom was right. There were fresh muffins in the basket – still warm.

 

“Well that settles it. My parents have officially thought of everything. Blueberry or banana nut?”

 

“Both. I’m famished and if I don’t put something in my stomach I’ll be pissed after one mimosa, and that is just embarrassing.”

 

Sara laughed and handed him his muffin and drink. She raised her flute.

 

“To Charles and Alice Hughes.”

 

“To _all_ the Hugheses,” Tom said. “I couldn’t possibly toast with out including my favorite member of the Hughes clan.”

 

Tom smiled and they clinked glasses.

 

They ate a few muffins between them and were on their second mimosa when Tom began.

 

“So, I made you a promise yesterday that I intend to keep.”

 

“Tom, you really don’t need to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

 

“No. You are my closest friend and you deserve to know what’s going on. I owe you that.”

 

Sara suddenly felt like she was not going to like what she was about to hear.

 

“Alright,” she said. “If you insist.”

 

“Well, I suppose it really all started a few weeks before graduation. I was stressed out with all my studies and Anna and I were spatting constantly. She said she was feeling neglected, that I didn’t care about her… all sorts of nonsense like that. But then she started in on you…”

 

Sara nearly choked on the sip of mimosa she’d just taken.

 

“Me?”

 

“Yes, you. Anna started to go crazy over the amount of time we were spending together.”

 

“Are you fucking kidding me? We were in the library, studying. We said maybe ten words to each other every night.”

 

Sara was starting to get heated. She definitely didn’t like where this was going.

 

“That’s what I told her, but she was having none of it. She just got more and more jealous of our friendship. No matter what I said or did, it didn’t matter. She had certain… ideas in her head.”

 

“What kind of ideas?”

 

Tom was silent for a moment.

 

“Tom, what kind of ideas?”

 

“Well she had never outright said anything – just passive aggressive comments and insinuations – until that night before graduation. She completely lost it that night. We were running a bit late and I went to text you to tell you we were running behind and she went completely mental. She started screaming about how she knew we were sleeping together and snatched my phone out of my hand to go through my messages to you, looking for some sort of evidence. I told her she’d gone mad but she wouldn’t stop, even after she’d gone through every single text message in my phone. Then after she found nothing, she accused me of deleting ‘incriminating’ texts. Then she started going on and on about the New York trip, calling it our ‘sex getaway’ and saying we were rubbing our affair in her face.”

 

Sara started to lose it.

 

“OHMYGOD I invited her to New York and she was the one who said no! It’s not my fault that her family had already planned their holiday to Greece. What the fuck, Tom?”

 

“I know. I know. That’s what I said. And I kept it together pretty well considering, but then she started…”

 

He trailed off and stared out the window, unable to look at her.

 

“Started what? Tom, what did she say?”

 

“I really didn’t want to have to tell you this. It hurts me to even have to say these words to you. I want you to know that.”

 

Sara took a deep breath. “Just tell me.”

 

He sighed and shook his head, clearly in pain reliving the memory of that night.

 

“She started saying all sorts of terrible things about you – that you had only ever dated Ed because I was with her and you were jealous, that you were sneaky and a liar and untrustworthy, just trying to get in my good graces as a friend so that you could put a wedge in our relationship, that you were…”

 

He stopped again. Sara was absolutely fuming now.

 

“That I was WHAT?”

 

“That you were… Good God, I can barely even repeat this it’s so disgusting.” He exhaled deeply. “She said that you were... how can I put this… quite promiscuous and suffering the consequences of that.”

 

Sara could have put her fist through the window.

 

“Tom, tell me exactly what the fuck she said, in her words, right now.”

 

“Alright!” He raised his voice for the first time in the entire conversation. “She called you a filthy slut and said that I should stay as far away from you as I could. She said she was glad she wasn’t on birth control and that we used condoms because she didn’t want me spreading your diseases on to her. Are you happy now? Is that what you wanted to hear?”

 

He was fully yelling now. Sara just stared at him. A single tear ran down her face.

 

“Oh, God. I’m so sorry. Please don’t cry. I didn’t mean to yell at you. Please please don’t cry. I only raised my voice because it still makes me so angry and I didn’t want to have to put it to you that way but you made me say it. I never wanted to have to say that to you.”

 

Sara wiped her face and regained her composure. She wasn’t mad at him. She was just sad.

 

“I know. I’m not mad at you. I should have just let it go.”

 

“No, you have a right to know. And for the record, I never for one single second believed a word of it. Not one word. You are the most honest person I know and I trust you with my life. And as for the other accusation… well I’m not even going to dignify that with a response.”

 

“Well, I appreciate that.”

 

“Anyway, after that I blew up at her and told her we were through. That’s when I left and came to meet you and Ed at the pub.”

 

“Well, that certainly explains everything.”

 

Tom was silent.

 

“Tom?”

 

“There’s a bit more.”

 

Sara felt sick to her stomach. She had a feeling she knew what he was about to say.

 

“Two days after graduation, Anna came to see me in London. She apologized for the way she had been acting, took back everything she said about us, and all the horrible things she said about you. She said she had just been paranoid because she felt like she was losing me. She was crying and just completely distraught and I… I didn’t know what to do or say, really. I was still so insanely angry with her, but she really did appear truly sorry. We ended up talking for a long time and we decided that we needed to take a bit of a break, but not break up.”

 

Sara felt like she had been hit with a two-by-four.

 

“So you’re telling me that, after all of that, you and Anna are still together?”

 

“No, not exactly together. We are… well I don’t really know what we are right now.”

 

“Have you spoken to her since you’ve been here?”

 

“No. I spoke with her the night we left and she wished us both a happy holiday, but I haven’t spoken to her since.”

 

“I don’t understand what you’re telling me, Tom.”

 

“If I had the slightest clue myself, I would tell you. But I don’t. I’m very confused, and I’m angry and I’m hurt and I’m sad. I’m feeling pretty much every emotion a man can feel right now. I don’t know whether I can ever be with her again, honestly. But at the time I felt like I needed to give her a chance to prove she was actually sorry for what she’d done.”

 

“And how do you feel now?”

 

“I don’t know, Sara. I honestly don’t know.”


	11. Chapter 11

They sat in silence for the next two or so hours, staring out opposite windows and listening to Miles Davis’s _Kind of Blue_ – a fitting soundtrack to the mood in the car. Neither had the desire ask Alex to change the CD, so it played on repeat as they made their way upstate. When they were about twenty minutes outside of Cooperstown, Sara turned toward Tom and broke the silence.

 

“I don’t even know why we aren’t speaking right now. I’m not angry with you. You’re not angry with me – at least I don’t think so. This is silly. What happened happened. I don’t want to make you feel any worse than you already feel. I really don’t. I’m sorry if I reacted poorly. I was just… well, I was not expecting that at all.”

 

Tom turned his head away from the scenery and looked in her direction, but he avoided meeting her gaze directly. His eyes were puffy and red around the edges.

 

“I’m not angry with you, Sara. I’m so far from angry with you. I don’t know how I expected you to react to hearing all that. I just feel awful that you’ve even been dragged into this mess in the first place.”

 

Sara leaned over and put her hand on the side of his face. “Look at me.”

 

Tom finally looked her in the eye and his face was sadder than she had ever seen it. It was such a stark contrast to the range of joyful expressions she had seen on his face over the course of the week that she almost started crying herself.

 

“It’s not your fault. You were put in a shitty situation. I don’t know that I would have reacted any differently. I certainly wouldn’t have wanted to tell you those things if the tables were turned.”

 

“I don’t know how to feel, Sara. I loved her. I really did. But the person I fell in love with would never have said the kind of things she said. When she came to London, she was just so upset… I wanted to be done with her once and for all, I really did. But I… I don’t know. She was just so sad and I was too weak and tired to break it off for good. I think the whole ‘break’ thing was just away for me to avoid the inevitable.”

 

Sara paused, knowing she had to ask a question she didn’t want to know the answer to.

 

“Do you still love her?”

 

Tom looked at her in silence for a minute that seemed like an eternity. He was contemplative, really thinking about the question as if it hadn’t occurred to him until that very minute to ask himself how he felt.

 

“How could I possibly still love her after what she said? When I look at you it makes me sick to my stomach that I even entertained the idea of getting back together with her.”

 

“Tom, you need to leave me out of it and decide for yourself whether or not you still love her. She brought me into it by saying those horrible things – yes – but your relationship with her has nothing to do with me. If you still love her, you should try to work it out.”

 

“That’s just it, though. Our relationship does have to do with you, because you will be in my life always. Always. I don’t want to think about a future without you in it. And if I go back to Anna, in the back of my mind, no matter how much she apologizes or how sweetly she acts towards you, I will always remember the horrible things that she said and I will never, ever forgive her for it.”

 

“Well it sounds like you’ve made your mind up, then.”

 

“Yes, I suppose I have. It’s just sad. What a horrific way to end things.”

 

“Break-ups are rarely clean and tidy. This one is especially awful, I’ll give you that, but it is what it is. At least now you know what you want.”

 

Tom laughed out of nowhere. Sara watched him, happy he was laughing again but completely confused as to why.

 

“Oh, Sara, I haven’t the slightest clue what I want.”

 

“Well then let me be the first to officially welcome you to the club. I’m not just a member – I’m the president.”

 

They were both laughing uncontrollably as Alex pulled into the shopping center in Cooperstown.

 

“OK, let’s split up and get this done quickly because I am beyond ready to be out of this car and relaxing at the house. How about I go grab the food and you hit the liquor store.”

 

“Sounds like a plan. What do you want?”

 

Sara gave him a backward glance as she walked away toward the grocery store. “Surprise me.”

 

Sara picked up some nice steaks and veggies to grill up for dinner, along with some random snack food and all the fixings for Tom’s legendary English breakfast. When she got back to the car, Tom was waiting with a mischievous grin on his face.

 

“Oh, Thomas, I know that look. What have you done?”

 

“I may have splurged a bit…”

 

“Oooooh what did you get?”

 

Tom reached into the bag and slid out a bottle of Balvenie Port Wood 21.

 

“Holy shit, Tom. That’s like a $200 bottle of scotch.”

 

“Well, I think we’ve earned it, don’t you?”

 

Sara just stared at him for a moment before her face broke out into a smile.

 

“You know, what? We have. Now let’s get to the house and bust into that baby.”

 

The house was on Lake Otsego, about ten minutes outside Cooperstown. When they finally got there and stepped out of the limo it felt like they were stepping into a whole other world. All the sadness and tension from the drive up melted away, and both of them were back to their usual selves – giddy with excitement and in good spirits, ready to relax and enjoy each other’s company. Sara tipped Alex generously and told him that they’d be ready to leave the next morning at around noon. Tom grabbed the bags and followed her as she dug out the key from her purse and unlocked the door.

 

The front of the property was such that the view of the lake was obscured by the house itself and by the forest of trees that flanked it on both sides. But stepping inside, the view of the sparkling waters of Lake Otsego opened up through the floor-to-ceiling glass windows of the open-air living and dining room. When Tom walked through the door he stopped dead in his tracks and dropped both bags.

 

“Oh my God.”

 

“I know. It’s beautiful, isn’t it? I never get tired of walking in to this house.”

 

“Can we just live here? Do you think your parents would mind?”

 

“I know my mother wouldn’t,” Sara muttered under her breath.

 

“What was that, love?”

 

“What? Oh, nothing. Let me just throw the food in the fridge and then I’ll show you around the house.”

 

As Sara was putting the food away Tom took notice of the items she’d purchased.

 

“I see someone is expecting an English breakfast in the morning.”

 

“God damn right I am. You’re always bragging about your skills – I want to see them in action.”

 

“Well I’m will be happy to prove to you that I am a master chef when it comes to a proper English breakfast. So, steaks tonight?”

 

“If you are the English breakfast master, I am the grill master.”

 

“Why do I have the feeling that you are going to set this house on fire?”

 

Sara swatted him on the arm.

 

“You just wait. You are going to eat those words when I present you with a steak grilled to absolute perfection. This isn’t my first rodeo, sir.”

 

“Alright well I can’t turn down an offer of a beautiful woman cooking me dinner.”

 

She smiled over her shoulder at him as she was placing the last of the groceries in the fridge. “You will not be disappointed. I promise you that. Now let me show you to your room.”

 

Sara took him upstairs and showed him to her bedroom.

 

“Sorry but you’re sleeping in my room. I’m barely ever here without my parents and I’m so taking advantage of the availability of the master bedroom. Let’s go grab you a bathing suit.”

 

Tom followed her into the master bedroom and he was awestruck when he entered the room. The sun streamed in through the wall of glass and fell on the crisp white sheets of the bed – a mahogany, four-poster masterpiece draped with sheer white fabric.

 

“Well I can see why you covet this bedroom.”

 

“I know, right? Here come look in the closet and see what my dad has stored away.”

 

There was a whole drawer full of bathing suits and Tom grabbed a pair of blue trunks out of the stack and held them up to his waist.

 

“Right, these should do just fine.”

 

“Excellent. Now get out so I can change. I’ll meet you downstairs in five.”

 

Sara dug through her bag and found her suit – a green bikini that matched her eyes. When she tried it on she found it a bit skimpier than she remembered, but she’d only packed the one so she didn’t really have much of a choice. Her mother’s suits were all too big for her, and considering Tom had already seen her completely naked on this trip, she figured it didn’t really matter. She grabbed some sunscreen out of the bathroom, threw a white linen cover up over her suit, and headed downstairs.

 

When she got down to the kitchen, Tom was dressed in the blue trunks and a thin, v-neck shirt, leaning against the kitchen island and turning the bottle of Balvenie around in his hand.

 

“A little early for that, no?”

 

“Normally I would say no scotch until sundown, but it’s been a hell of a day. Come on. You know you want some.”

 

“I don’t turn down a good single malt. I don’t care what time of day it is. The scotch glasses are in the cabinet above the sink.”

 

Tom grabbed two heavy-bottomed glasses from the cabinet as Sara went to fetch two beach towels out of the linen closet. Tom handed her a glass and raised it.

 

“To new beginnings.”

 

They clinked glasses and headed out the back door onto the porch. The sun was high in the afternoon sky and danced across the seemingly endless expanse of lake spread out in front of them. There wasn’t another house around for miles and at that moment it felt like they were the only two people in the world. Sara laid the towels out on the lounge chairs and pulled out the sunscreen. As she lifted her cover up over her head and threw it aside, she could feel Tom’s eyes poring over her half-naked body but she didn’t dare meet them. She threw her hair into a messy bun and slathered her front with sunscreen, making sure to hit every spot. She was looking away from him still but out of the corner of her eye, she could see he was still watching her every move, following her hands as they rubbed the lotion into the skin around her breasts and stomach. After she was done with her legs, she turned to him and he got caught staring.

 

“My eyes are up here, Thomas,” she giggled. “Can you do my back?”

 

He smirked back at her. “Gladly.”

 

Sara turned away, her back facing him, and he covered her back with sunscreen. His hands were long and strong and felt amazing as they slid across her skin, massaging the sunscreen into every inch of her. When he slipped his hands under the back strap of her bikini top, it sent chills coursing through her entire body.

 

“There, all done. My turn.”

 

Tom whipped off his t-shirt and Sara returned the favor. His skin was baby soft and she loved the way his muscles rippled under her touch. She knew she was enjoying this too much, but she didn’t care. The warm buzz she had going from the scotch was slowly lowering her inhibitions and she applied more pressure then necessary, kneading the lotion firmly into his shoulders. He threw his head all the way forward and groaned.

 

“That feels amazing.”

 

She felt like if she didn't stop now, she might never take her hands off him so she patted his shoulders twice.

 

“Well, that should do it.”

 

He whined back at her. “I really wish you hadn’t stopped.”

 

“Tom, if you want a full body massage, you’re going to have to pay me. Now do your front or you’ll be bright red.”

 

She popped on her sunglasses and situated herself in the lounge chair, forcing herself to avoid the sight of him rubbing down his lean, sculpted body. He looked too good and she was enjoying the sight of him too much. She knew that if she watched him, she was asking for trouble.

 

He settled into his chair and they stared out at the lake, not speaking, just marveling at the beauty of the landscape in front of them. Both felt more relaxed than they had in a long time, and they lounged for what seemed like ages, just listening to the birds chirping and the soft sound of the water lapping against the edge of the dock. After a while, Sara flipped over onto her stomach to make sure her tan came out even. She hadn’t intended on falling asleep but when she woke she could tell by the position of the sun in the sky that she must have been out for at least an hour.

 

She flipped herself back over and found Tom staring squarely at her ass.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

He smiled. “Oh, just enjoying the view. You’re getting a bit red, love, shall we go in?”

 

“Yeah that’s probably a good idea. I’m starving anyway, should I start dinner?”

 

“Yes, I’m dying to see your grilling skills in action.”

 

It was nearly 7 o’clock by the time Sara finished dinner. They opted to dine on the porch since it had cooled down a bit and there was a nice breeze coming in off the lake. Sara waited eagerly as Tom took the first bite of his steak. He moaned with approval as he savored the bite and swallowed.

 

“I officially renounce any and all doubts I had about your grilling abilities. This is, without question, the most delicious steak I have ever had.”

 

Sara flashed him a self-satisfied smile. “Never doubt me, Thomas.”

 

“Oh,” he said with his mouth full, “I wouldn’t dream of it.”


	12. Chapter 12

The sun was hanging low in the sky by the time they finished up dinner and the sky was streaked pink and orange over the clear blue waters of the lake. They cleared the dishes and Tom grabbed the bottle of Balvenie from the kitchen counter.

 

“Well I’m ready to get serious about this bottle. Shall we go down to the dock and watch the sunset?”

 

“You read my mind,” Sara replied. “I don’t think there’s anything more beautiful than a sunset.”

 

“I can think of a few things,” Tom said with a cheeky smile.

 

Sara grabbed a thick flannel blanket and they walked down to the dock’s edge. They sat with their legs dangling over the side and the cool water felt amazing against their bare skin after the day’s intense heat. Tom poured them each a few fingers of scotch and, as they were wont to do while engaged in serious drinking, they traded stupid childhood stories as they watched the sun slowly dip below the horizon, casting a rosy glow over the lake before dusk turned to night. The dock light had been broken for as long as Sara could remember, but the moon was nearly full and cast an incandescent sheen that danced on the calm waters of the lake, illuminating everything.

 

Sara was looking up at the stars and laughing while Tom was in the middle of a story about some prank he played at Eton, which she had heard a thousand times but never tired of. She took a sip of scotch and looked over at Tom - completely wrapped up in his tale, smiling and laughing at his own shenanigans - and she thought to herself that he had never looked more beautiful than he did at that moment. His smooth skin was glowing in the moonlight, and she could see his blue eyes sparkle even brighter in the near-darkness than they did in the light of day. She was so wrapped up in him that she didn’t even notice that he’d finished his story.

 

“Your turn,” he said, pouring himself another glass.

 

“I can’t think of a good one. Besides, you’ve heard them all before.”

 

“Well then tell me something you’ve never told anyone.”

 

There was only one thing Sara had never told anyone, and she wasn’t about to reveal it to him.

 

“I’m not one for keeping secrets, Tom.”

 

“Oh, darling, everyone has secrets. Come – out with it.”

 

Sara moved quickly to change the subject, knowing if he kept pestering her she was bound to get herself into trouble. She could never resist him, especially when he plied her with his puppy dog eyes.

 

“I’ve got a better idea. In the spirit of utter childishness and debauchery, how about a good old fashioned game of Truth or Dare?”

 

“Ooooh, feeling daring, are we?”

 

“Or truthful. I guess you’ll have to wait and see.” She gulped down a mouthful of her drink. “Rock, paper, scissors for who goes first.”

 

Sara lost. She always lost. Tom laughed at her. “Well, it was your idea after all. Now, the all-important question - Truth or Dare?”

 

“Dare.”

 

“I was hoping you’d say that,” he said, taking a sip. “Hmm. Now that you are at my command, what shall I have you do?”

 

Sara could see the wheels turning in his head and waited anxiously to hear what his devious mind was concocting.

 

“I dare you to finish that massage you started earlier.”

 

“I told you earlier, Thomas – if you want a full-body massage, you’ve got to pay up.”

 

“Darling, the rules of the game are simple. I have dared you, you must comply. Now get on with it.”

 

Tom ripped his shirt off and tossed it aside as he rolled over flat onto his stomach on the blanket. Sara stared at him for a moment, his bare back glistening in the moonlight, and took a swig of her drink. She knelt beside him and started kneading away at his shoulders.

 

“Oh no, you’re not getting off that easy. Up you go.”

 

He gave her leg a nudge, indicating he wanted her to straddle him while she worked out his kinks. She complied, swinging one leg over him and settling herself in the crook between his ass and thighs.

 

“That’s more like it.”

 

Sara picked up where she had left off earlier, only this time she put her whole body into it, stretching herself cat-like atop his long frame as she slid her palms from the base of his swim trunks in a hard line up to the nape of his neck. She could feel the vibrations run through her as he groaned with pleasure beneath her.

 

“Your hands are magic,” he purred. “Don’t stop.”

 

“It’s your dare. I’ll stop when you tell me to.”

 

“Well then we might be here for a while.”

 

She bent all the way over him to work his shoulders and neck and her breasts lightly grazed his back. The sensation made her shiver and she wondered if he could feel her wetness through her bikini bottoms. If he did, he didn’t seem to mind. The sounds coming out of him were animal – like nothing she’d ever heard before. She began to work her way back down, shifting herself lower onto his legs and working his lower back, around those sexy little dimples just above his ass. She didn’t dare go any lower. She could feel him tense up as she worked his hips along the line of his swim trunks and she realized he was holding his breath. She leaned into him and whispered in his ear: “Don’t forget to breathe.”

 

He let out a gust of air and laughed.

 

“Darling, I could go on like this for hours but it doesn’t seem fair. As much as it pains me, I declare your dare officially fulfilled – and quite expertly so, I might add.”

 

“Thank you, Thomas,” she said, raising herself off him. “Now it’s time for my fun. Truth or Dare?”

 

As he rolled himself over, he pulled his legs in close to his stomach as he inched himself back toward the edge of the dock. As hard as he was trying to hide it, she could see he had an erection. She kindly pretended not to notice, instead badgering him for an answer.

 

“Come on, now. Which one is it?”

 

Knowing that any dare would involve him getting up, revealing the massive bulge in his trunks, Tom chose truth.

 

“Ooooh, bad move, Thomas. Bad move.”

 

“I’m assuming I should refill my glass for this question?”

 

“Oh, I think so. I’ve been wanting to ask you this for days.”

 

Tom cocked his head in her direction as he poured. “Oh, really? Well now I’m intrigued.”

 

Sara had been thinking about this question since the morning he walked in on her and she absolutely had to know the answer. Or rather, she was pretty sure she knew the answer, but she wanted to hear him say it. It seemed as good a time as any to ask.

 

“So, the other morning, when you walked in on me naked – you took an awfully long time in the shower. And since I refuse to believe that you had trouble picking out clothes to wear, I have to know – what exactly took you so long?”

 

Tom closed his eyes and looked down, shaking his head.

 

“Ehehehe. I guess I’m busted there.” He looked up and met her eyes.

 

She smiled coyly at him and leaned forward. “Tell me.”

 

He was blushing. “What can I say? I’m a red-blooded man. You are a beautiful woman. It had occurred to me, on occasion, to wonder what you might look like disrobed. But the fantasy didn’t come close to the reality. It was a little more than I could handle so I had to, uhhh, take matters into my own hands.”

 

Sara giggled. “I knew it.”

 

“Oh you did, did you? Then why did you ask?”

 

“Because I wanted to hear you say it.”

 

“Well, I’ve said it. And I’m not sorry, either,” he said, flashing his roguish smile. “Now, Truth or Dare?”

 

Sara was emboldened by the scotch and by her desire for Tom. The thought of him touching himself in the shower while thinking about her naked body (and who knows what else) was too much. She couldn’t deny it anymore, and she didn’t want to.

 

“Dare.”

 

Tom’s face lit up with a devilish grin. He leaned in close to her and his voice was both wicked and smooth like honey: “I dare you to strip down and jump in the lake.”

 

She just stared into his eyes, which were dark with lust in a way she’d never seen them before. She knew he was dead serious and there was no turning back.

 

“Only if you come with me.”

 

“Darling, I’d be delighted.”

 

Sara stood and started to strip off her clothes. Tom sat back and watched as she pulled her cover-up off and untied her bikini top, letting it fall to the dock with a soft thud. She could hear a sharp intake of breath from Tom’s direction as she shimmied out of her bikini bottoms and stood completely naked in the moonlight.

 

“Your turn.”

 

He stood up, never taking his eyes off of her body, and as he pulled down his swim trunks it was Sara’s turn to fight for air. He was only half hard, and it was already huge. In two long strides he was on her, picking her up over his head like a ragdoll and tossing her into the lake. The water was so cold it stole her breath when she hit it, and she didn’t notice that he had jumped in after her. He snuck up behind her under the water and pulled her down beneath the surface, grabbing at her hips with his strong hands to keep her under while she struggled against him. He let her up after a few seconds and she wrapped an arm around his neck so she could catch her breath. She swatted his bare chest.

 

“You ass! I could have drowned.”

 

He grabbed her legs under the water and wrapped them around his waist, pulling her in to him. Despite the temperature, his erection remained rock hard and weighty against her stomach. As he drew her in closer, she gasped as her nipples, taut to the point of aching from the freezing water, pressed into the slick muscles of his chest.

 

“I could drown in your eyes,” he said, and moved in for a kiss.

 

He grazed her lips with his, as if asking permission, and when he finally pressed his mouth to hers she felt the warm tingling in her lips surge through her entire body. Tom kissed her tenderly and sweetly – the way she’d always imagined he might - but she could feel the yearning behind it. She took action, grabbing a fistful of his hair and deepening the kiss, and he moaned his approval against her lips. She was wrapped entirely around him – legs gripping his waist, one arm grasping his muscular neck and the other clasping handfuls of his hair while they devoured each other, only kept afloat by his long legs pumping beneath them. He cupped her ass gently in one hand as he ran the other up her spine to her neck and she almost burst. She pulled out of the kiss and threw her head back, crying his name out into the stars. She turned her face back to him, breathless, and he pulled her closer.

 

“Tell me to stop and I will,” he said, panting with lust and exertion.

 

“Don’t stop,” she whispered. “Please don’t stop.”

 

He kissed her again, this time nibbling at her lower lip and begging entrance to her mouth with his tongue. She yielded to him, and he kissed her hard and deep with all the passion that had lain dormant for so many years. She brought her hand from his hair and ran it down his side, feeling his abdominal muscles rippling as he treaded water. He brought a hand up and cupped her breast and her whole body convulsed. He pulled away.

 

“You must be freezing.”

 

Sara grabbed his face and kissed him hard. She pulled away, smirking.

 

“Why don’t we get out and you can warm me up.”

 

Tom let out a low growl as he grabbed her ass and pushed her towards the dock. She could feel his eyes boring holes into her backside as she rose out of the water climbing the dock ladder, and by the time she’d reached the blanket on the dock he grabbed it out of her hands and spread it out beneath them. He grabbed her and pulled her close to him.

 

“Lie down,” he whispered.

 

Tom guided her down onto the blanket and lowered himself on top of her, wrapping them both up tightly in the flannel blanket. Sara was shivering but the heat coming off Tom’s body as he caressed her goosepimpled skin began to warm her. He traced one long finger from her temple down to her jaw before cupping her face in both hands and kissing her again. He pulled away to look down at her, drinking in the sight of her nakedness.

 

“You are so beautiful, Sara.”

 

The sound of her name on his lips, the way his naked body felt against hers, the way his piercing blue eyes locked onto her – she couldn’t control herself. She wrapped her legs around him and pulled him tight to her. She could feel how throbbing hard he was for her as he slowly ground his hips against her as he kissed her. She moved with him, her wetness soon covering him and she moaned loudly as he slid his impressive length up and down her slick folds.

 

“Tom,” she said breathless. “I want you. I need you. Please.”

 

He pressed his forehead to hers, their eyes locked onto one another as he trailed his hand down her stomach and teased at her entrance with his middle finger while his thumb worked magic on her nub. She was dripping for him and as he slowly pushed his long finger into her they both let out a collective moan. She clawed at his back as he pumped his finger in and out. He took his hand away, never breaking eye contact, grabbing his shaft and positioning himself at her entrance. She was straining up to meet him, aching to have him inside her. He pushed into her delicately, wanting to feel every inch of her slide over him, and when he had filled her to the hilt he stopped. He took her face in his hands and placed a gentle kiss on her lips.

 

“I love you,” he said. “I’ve loved you since the day I met you.”

 

Hearing those words from his beautiful lips – words she’d yearned for for so long – she immediately tightened around him as he buried his hands in her hair.

 

“I’ve always loved you,” she whispered. “I’ll always love you.”

 

He kissed her again, groaning his pleasure as he started to move inside her – languidly, lovingly, savoring every sensation. She spread her legs wider underneath him, allowing him deeper access. As he began to swirl his hips, he found a spot she had only ever found herself and she grabbed his ass and pulled him hard into her.

 

“Ohh yes, right there,” she cried out. “Right there, Tom. Don’t stop.”

 

He heeded her demands and worked her harder, hitting her sweet spot with every stroke until she began to writhe and shudder underneath him. He could feel her begin to tighten and pulse and he knew she was close.

 

“Come for me, darling,” he said. “Keep your eyes on me. I want to see you.”

 

Sara kept her eyes locked onto his and came harder than she ever had in her life. Her cries of ecstasy echoed across the lake and Tom dropped his head down beside hers, panting in her ear with each thrust as he came closer and closer to his release. He could feel himself ready to burst and he pulled out almost completely before thrusting himself back in to the hilt and moaning in her ear as he filled her. She could feel his warmth spread inside of her and she clung to him as his body shuddered and stiffened. They laid there motionless for a long while, bodies still entangled and hearts beating in tandem. When he finally rose to dismount her he placed a gentle kiss on the tip of her freckled nose.

 

Tom rolled over on his back beside her, placing one arm around her as she draped a leg over him and nuzzled into his chest. They looked up at the stars and no words were spoken. Neither wanted to think of the future or what consequences the consummation of their desires might bring. All they wanted was to live in this moment – to keep these few precious hours for themselves and themselves alone. They knew that whatever would come after, they would always have the lake house. 


	13. Chapter 13

The sun streamed in through the wall of glass in the master bedroom as Sara woke the next morning. Tom was still sleeping, his naked body wrapped snugly around hers and he looked so peaceful she hesitated to move for fear of waking him. She shifted slightly to nuzzle closer to him and he started to rouse.

 

“Morning, beautiful,” he said, kissing a trail down the side of her neck to her back. She moaned softly with delight at the feel of his warm lips on her skin and turned around to face him.

 

“Morning, handsome.”

 

He brushed a bit of hair from her eyes and pulled her face to his, kissing her tenderly.

 

“I believe someone is owed a proper English breakfast.”

 

“Mmmm that sounds like perfection,” she purred.

 

“You are perfection.” He planted a kiss on her forehead. “I’m going to have a quick shower and then I’ll get to work.”

 

He cast off the covers and Sara propped herself up in bed, her eyes drawn to his bare bottom as he walked from the bed to the bathroom. She heard the shower start to run and contemplated going back to sleep for a few more minutes but her urges got the best of her. She snuck out of bed and into the bathroom, opening the door silently and creeping towards the curtain. She poked her head around and took in the sight of Tom, water running in rivulets down his chiseled frame. His head was thrown back into the water stream, eyes closed and mouth open as he let the hot water run over him. She tried not to make a sound as she stole into the shower. She ran her hands up his chest and he jumped back, quickly grabbing her hips for balance.

 

“Christ you scared me.”

 

She flashed her most mischievous grin. “I would say sorry, but I’d be lying.”

 

He smiled down at her as he pulled her in closer. She could feel him hardening against her stomach.

 

“I said I wanted to have a quick shower. With you in here, I don’t know how quick it will be.”

 

“What if I promised not to be naughty?”

 

“Darling, if I agreed to that, I’d be the one lying.”

 

He pulled her in for a deep kiss and moved one hand to her breast, massaging it as the other cradled her lower back. He began to kiss down her neck to her other breast, taking her nipple gently in his mouth and running circles around it with his tongue. She went weak as he worked at her and had to turn and place her back against the cold shower tiles to brace herself. She buried her hands in his hair and cried out when he started to nibble and flick at her hardened nub with his tongue. He moaned onto her and added yet another sensation that drove her crazy. She was already close to the edge when he moved his hand from her chest down between her legs. Using one knee to widen her stance, he ran his fingers along her entrance and teased her a bit before entering her – first one finger, then two. She closed her eyes and gripped his shoulders with both hands as his fingers danced inside of her.

 

Suddenly she felt the absence of his mouth and she opened her eyes to see him staring wickedly up at her as he knelt and licked a slow trail down her stomach. She almost came with just the anticipation. When she felt his mouth close around her she moaned long and deep. He suckled at her clit with his lips and gently circled it with his tongue as his fingers worked their magic inside her. He groaned his lust against her sensitive flesh and the vibration brought her reeling over the edge. She steadied herself on his shoulders as she climaxed, feeling her walls tighten against his long fingers as he continued to pump into her. He kept working her as she rode out her orgasm and she had to pull him off her because she couldn’t handle any more.

 

“Tom, stop. I can’t… I…” She was panting and breathless and couldn’t form words.

 

He laughed. “I’ll take that as a compliment,” he said, rising off his knees and kissing up her neck. He nibbled her earlobe and whispered in her ear: “You taste like heaven.”

 

The sound of his honey-smooth voice in her ear sent an aftershock running through her. She let the water run over her for a minute as she composed herself, and when she snapped out of her daze Tom was all lathered up and rinsing himself clean.

 

“Well, I think my job here is done,” he said, smirking. “I’m going to go start breakfast.”

 

He kissed her on the cheek and hopped out of the shower, leaving her speechless.

 

By the time Sara was showered and dressing, the mouth-watering scent of bacon was wafting in to the master bedroom. She threw on a light cotton sundress and darted downstairs to find Tom masterfully juggling the various elements of a full English breakfast.

 

“Well, I’m already impressed and I haven’t even tasted a thing.”

 

He looked over his shoulder and smiled at her as his hands moved effortlessly from pan to pan. His jaw dropped a bit when he saw her and turned away.

 

“You look absolutely stunning so you’ll have to forgive me if I don’t turn around for the duration of this fry-up.”

 

Sara laughed. “Well I’ve been looking forward to this for a long time and I wouldn’t want to distract you from the task at hand.”

 

“Right, well should be done in a few minutes.”

 

“OK, well I’ll leave you be… for now.”

 

Sara went out onto the back porch to enjoy the view when she noticed that all the evidence of the previous evening’s activities were still down by the dock’s edge. She rushed down to collect their discarded clothes and the nearly drained bottle of scotch and glasses. She smiled as she gathered up the items, remembering that beautiful moment when they had finally expressed their love for one another – both verbally and physically. She vowed never to forget one millisecond of that night as long as she lived. By the time she’d returned to the kitchen, everything was ready.

 

“Breakfast is served,” Tom said, placing a plate and a mug of tea in front of her on the kitchen island. Sara dug in and was not disappointed.

 

“Tom, this is incredible.”

 

“Thank you, love. Only the best for you.”

 

They sat next to each other at the kitchen island, enjoying their breakfast and each other’s company. They were reveling in the bliss of this brief moment of domesticity, but they both knew that in a few short hours their time at the lake house would come to a close. With just a look, they made a silent vow to stay in the moment, not to talk about it or analyze it – to just live it and enjoy it and love one another until the world outside got in the way.

 

Noon came all too soon and as they sat together on one lounge chair, Tom’s arms wrapped around Sara as she lay between his legs staring out over the lake, they heard Alex pull into the driveway. Sara sighed.

 

“I guess it’s that time,” she said, looking up at him.

 

“Guess so. I’ll go grab the bags.”

 

They got up and Sara turned to walk inside but Tom grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her close to him.

 

“I don’t think my heart will ever leave this place,” he said.

 

“Me neither.”

 

He buried his hands in her hair and kissed her. They could have stayed lip-locked forever but were interrupted by a series of brief honks.

 

“Alright then, ready?” he asked.

 

“No, but let’s go. You’ve got a flight to catch.”

 

Sara felt a sharp pang of sorrow as she thought about Tom leaving that night, but she shook it off. She still had a few hours left with him and she was determined to make them count.

 

They greeted Alex in the driveway and he took their bags from Tom and placed them in the trunk.

 

“Did you enjoy your stay, Mr. Hiddleston?”

 

“Best night of my life. Unforgettable.” Tom said, and smiled over at Sara. She blushed, trying and failing to avoid Alex’s face.

 

“You look like you got a bit of color, Ms. Hughes.”

 

“Yes, I suppose I did.”

 

As they settled into the back of the limo, Alex opened the partition halfway.

 

“Anything in particular you’d like to listen to on the ride down?”

 

Sara turned to Tom.

 

“Your choice, Thomas.”

 

“Have you got any Bob Dylan?”

 

“Why yes, sir, I do.”

 

Alex closed the partition and _The Essential Bob Dylan_ started up, and Sara suddenly remembered their late night all those years ago, when the idea for the New York trip was born.

 

“Shit, Tom. You know what we forgot to do?”

 

“Take the picture. Will we have time later?”

 

“Oh, we’ll make time.”

 

They sat in silence for the first half-hour or so, each lost in thought as they held each other close. Sara dozed off for a while and when she woke a while later Tom was stroking her hair and looking down at her.

 

“I will never get over how beautiful you are.”

 

He leaned down and kissed her softly. He had intended for it to be a brief kiss, but the feel of her lips on his and the knowledge of how little time they had left stirred something in him that he couldn’t control. He deepened the kiss and before he knew it she was up and straddling him on the seat and he had pulled her dress up to her waist, revealing a skimpy lace thong. His jeans grew tight as he pawed at her bare ass while she grinded down onto him.

 

“Oh good God, why did you have to wear those.”

 

“Would you rather I wear nothing?”

 

He let out a low groan. “You have no idea what you do to me.”

 

She reached down and palmed his erection through his jeans. “Oh, I think I do.”

 

Sara slid off of him and pulled down her dress. She pressed the button to lower the partition a bit.

 

“Alex, can you turn the music up a bit?”

 

“Anything you like, Ms. Hughes.”

 

She closed the partition and knelt in front of Tom, popping the button of his jeans open and slowly lowering the zipper.

 

“I think I owe you for this morning,” she said, running her hands up under his shirt and back down to the bulge in his jeans. He threw his head back and moaned as she stroked him through the fabric. He placed a hand in her hair and looked down at her with want in his eyes.

 

“Anything you like, Ms. Hughes.”

 

She reached into his boxers and stroked him a few times inside his clothes before he grabbed the side of his jeans and boxers and pulled them down to release himself. He was already erect but as she worked his shaft he grew impossibly hard in her hand. She bent down and took his tip in her mouth as she continued to stroke him, swirling her tongue in concentric circles gradually closing in on the center and tasting just the tiniest drop of precum as she tongued him. She moaned onto the head of his cock as she tasted him for the first time and she felt his body tense and shiver.

 

She took her mouth off him briefly and looked up at him with a playful smile before returning her focus to his sex. She slowly licked the underside from base to tip and he let out an animal groan as she reached the top and took what she could of him into her mouth. She’d never been with anyone as big as Tom and she didn’t know whether she’d be able to take it all so she let her hand do the work at the base and pumped her strokes in time with her mouth, swirling her hand around him as she sucked the top half of his impressive length. His hands entangled in her hair, he began to let out a series of low grunts as he bucked his hips up to meet her mouth. She could tell he wanted more of her but she was scared to try it. She pulled off him for a moment.

 

“Tom, you’re so big I don’t know if I can…”

 

“Shhh” he said and pressed a long finger to her lips. “You’re not even done and this is the best I’ve ever had.”

 

That gave her all the confidence she needed. She loosened her throat as best she knew how and very slowly took his length deep. She could feel the tip hit the back of her throat and she almost stopped but the sounds Tom was making urged her forward. She kept going until she had taken all of him into her mouth and throat and she stayed still and listened to his ecstatic moans until she couldn’t take it anymore. She popped off him wetly and gulped down as much air as she could.

 

“Holy shit that was fucking amazing,” he said. “Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.”

 

She went back to work, stroking and sucking him faster now, no longer fearful when he thrust up into her. She felt his grip on her hair tighten.

 

“Oh fuck, I’m gonna come.”

 

She looked up into his eyes without taking her mouth off him and moaned onto his cock, wordlessly giving him permission for his release. He threw his head back and let out a silent scream as he came gushing into her mouth and she could feel him pulsing in her hand as she squeezed every last drop out of him and swallowed. When he was through she licked him clean, gently kissing the tip and sending shockwaves running through his body. Now it was his turn to pull her off him.

 

“I can’t. No more. Please… I.”

 

She licked her lips and smiled. “I know the feeling.”


	14. Chapter 14

Alex made good time back to the city and they pulled up in front of the brownstone at 3:30. Tom’s flight left JFK at 10:30 that evening and Sara’s heart grew heavy at the thought that in seven hours, Tom would take off back to London while she remained in New York for the foreseeable future. Sara had landed an entry-level job at _The New Yorker_ , and she should have been beside herself with excitement to take on such a coveted position, but the thought of staying in New York, not knowing when she might see Tom next, and having an ocean lay between them made her immeasurably sad. She was determined to make the most of the few short hours they had left.

 

They went upstairs to drop their bags and found the house empty. Sara wondered where her parents might be and she needed to know what time they had scheduled dinner so she called her mother’s cell while Tom wandered off to the library, predictably his favorite room in the house.

 

“Hello, sweetheart. How was everything?”

 

“Absolutely perfect, Mom. Thank you. Where are you guys?”

 

“Oh just doing a bit of shopping. Should be back in an hour or so. We’ve made a 6:00 reservation for dinner so we can make sure Tom gets to the airport with plenty of time to spare. I’ve got to go – your father is looking impatient and I absolutely have to pick up a few more things before he drags me home. Love you sweetie.”

 

“Love you, too. See you in a bit.”

 

Sara hung up and walked up to Tom, who was in literary heaven perusing the wall-to-ceiling collection.

 

“Dinner’s at 6. Seems we’ve got a bit of time to kill. Anything you want to do?”

 

Tom turned to her smiled. “Where have your parents gone to?”

 

“Seems my mother has dragged my dad out for some Saturday shopping. That won’t last much longer, though. Sounds like he’s getting restless so they should be back in an hour.”

 

“An hour, you say?” Tom moved toward her and grabbed her hips, spinning her around and pinning her to the shelves. “There’s a lot we can do in an hour.”

 

He leaned in and kissed her, pressing his hips against her firmly as he moved one hand up to cup her face. She lost herself in the kiss for a moment before pulling away.

 

“Tom, we can’t. What if they come back early?”

 

The excuse rang hollow in her ears as she protested, knowing that her hesitation wasn’t about fear of getting caught in the act. Even though he was standing right in front of her, Sara was already feeling the loss of him, and she couldn’t help but think that if she had him again, the pain of his leaving would grow exponentially harder to bear. Tom’s face changed. He really could read her like a book. He took a step back from her, still holding her face.

 

“That’s not what really concerns you, is it?”

 

Sara didn’t know what to say. They had made a silent pledge to just live in the moment, but that was at the lake house. Being back in New York with Tom’s flight only hours away changed things somehow. It seemed more real, and with that truth came the pain of knowing that all they had shared might just be fleeting. They were back in the real world now, and their love had no place there.

 

“Tom, I want to, I just…”

 

“It’s alright, love. You don’t need to explain. I understand.”

 

Despite her best efforts to keep it at bay, a single tear rolled from her eye and met his hand where he held her. He wiped it away and kissed the salty skin where it had fallen.

 

“Don’t cry, darling. It’ll be alright.”

 

Sara smiled though her heart was breaking. She had finally accepted the fact that she was in love with Tom, only to find he felt the same way, and now he was about to leave her. Nothing about that was going to be alright.

 

Tom suggested they watch a movie and Sara agreed. Cuddling up to him on the couch seemed like an innocent enough activity, and she supposed if they snuck a few kisses in every now and again, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. They moved to the living room and Tom surveyed the offerings.

 

“Your choice, Thomas.”

 

“Hmm well you’ve got quite an extensive collection here, but I think I’ve found just the thing.”

 

He slipped _Jurassic Park_ off of the shelf and Sara laughed.

 

“Why am I not surprised?”

 

“Oh come on. It never gets old.”

 

“Alright but if you start running around the room pretending to be a velociraptor, I’m turning it off.”

 

Tom threw his head back and laughed, his tongue poking ever so slightly through his teeth.

 

“I’m not making any promises.”

 

They snuggled together on the couch, Tom spooning her with a long arm wrapped round her waist and fingers interlaced with hers. She burrowed her head into the crook between his chest and arm, taking in the scent of him. Sara found herself hoping that, if she pressed herself close enough to him, his smell would somehow stick to her clothes. When he was gone, she wanted something tangible to hold on to – to be able to turn to when she got lonely or sad. And Tom smelled amazing. She never wanted to forget that smell.

 

With the exception of the few chaste kisses Tom had planted on her neck and fingertips, they were making it though the movie without incident. Part of Sara was disappointed that she hadn’t given in to her desires, but she knew it was time to start thinking with her head and not her heart. Tom was leaving. He’d be starting at RADA soon and living in London indefinitely, and she had taken a job in New York. She would be looking for an apartment soon, moving in with friends, and starting a life without him in it. She had always known she would move back to America after she finished university, but it hadn’t become truly real to her until she was faced with losing the most important thing in her life – possibly for good.

 

About halfway through the movie, Sara heard her parents arrive home. She disentangled herself from Tom and sat up on the couch.

 

“Sorry we didn’t make it to the kitchen scene. I know it’s your favorite.”

 

“Well that’s probably for the best as I don’t know that I would have been able to suppress my inner velociraptor.”

 

Sara rolled her eyes at him and sighed. “OK, fine. You get one minute. Go.”

 

Tom sprang off the couch, drawing his arms in to his chest and crouching as he crept around the room, screeching his pitch-perfect imitation. Sara erupted into an uncontrollable giggle fit and, with his raptor fix sufficiently sated, Tom fell backwards on the couch and joined her in uncontrollable laughter.

 

“What’s so funny, you two?”

 

Alice stood in the doorway to the living room with Charles at her back, burdened with that Saturday’s haul of shopping bags from 5th Avenue.

 

“Oh, nothing,” Sara said, having finally caught her breath. “Tom was just doing one of his impressions. Jesus, Mom, did you buy enough stuff? Anything in there for me?”

 

“Well, as a matter of fact, yes. I may have got you a little something. You too, Thomas.”

 

Tom was taken aback by her generosity. “Oh, Alice, bless you but I couldn’t possibly accept…”

 

“Oh, hush. It’s our pleasure. I’ll leave your things in your rooms. Finish up down here but don’t forget we’ve got dinner in an hour.”

 

Sara suddenly remembered that they had yet to take the picture and called out to her mother as she was about to leave.

 

“Are we going somewhere close? Tom and I have one last thing we have to do.”

 

“Yes, we’re going just up the street – the little Italian place, nothing too fancy. What do you two have planned?”

 

“Oh, it’s nothing. It’ll just take a minute. We’ve got to go over to Jones Street and take a picture.”

 

Sara’s mother laughed. “ _Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan_?”

 

“How did you know?”

 

“Sara, sometimes I think you forget I gave birth to you. We’ll leave a bit early and get the picture in before dinner, but you two should start getting ready soon.”

 

Sara’s parents took off upstairs and left the pair alone again. When Sara looked over at Tom, his eyes were filled with sadness. She placed her hand gently on his shoulder.

 

“Are you OK?”

 

“No, I really don’t think I am. I don’t want to leave you.”

 

He looked down at the floor and buried his hands in his blonde curls. Sara tried to comfort him as best she could, but she was feeling the same way and she was struggling to find the right words.

 

“I don’t want you to leave either, but you have to. You’ve got a whole life waiting for you back in London – new beginnings, remember? You’ve got RADA, and then you’re going to start your career, and you’re going to be brilliant. You have dreams to follow, Tom. And so do I. You told me that.”

 

“And what if I can’t dream about a life without you in it? What then?”

 

“Don’t do that. Please don’t do that. I couldn’t bear it if you sacrificed all you’ve worked for just for me. You have to go, Tom, and I have to stay. That’s just the way it is. We both knew that there was no happy ending to be had here. I’m not saying I regret it, because I don’t. I’ll never regret it. But you and I… it just can’t happen. Not now, anyway.”

 

Sara knew she was speaking the truth but hearing the words coming out of her own mouth moved her to tears, and Tom soon followed.

 

“Whatever happened to _omnia vincit amor_ – love conquering all?”

 

“Quoting Virgil isn’t going to help us out of this one, Tom.”

 

Tom sighed deeply and wiped his eyes. “I know. It just hurts. I love you, Sara.”

 

Sara channeled all the positivity she could muster, which was not something she was particularly good at. But it was what Tom needed and, for him, she could do anything.

 

“And I love you, so let’s not waste what time we have left sitting in a dark room feeling sorry for ourselves. We have a cheesy picture to take and a delicious dinner to eat. And it seems we have presents to open, too. Let’s go.”

 

She took him by the hand and they walked upstairs. Sara entered her room to find a green dress spread out across her bed. It took her breath away it was so beautiful. She immediately stripped down and tried it on and it fit her like a glove. She was admiring herself in the mirror when Tom knocked at the door.

 

“Are you decent?” he asked, and she could sense his sly little grin without having to see his face.

 

“Yes, come in.”

 

When he entered she turned to him, putting on a bit of a show and spinning a little to let the floor length fabric swirl around at her feet.

 

Tom stared with his mouth agape.

 

“Darling, you look absolutely stunning. It matches your eyes.”

 

“I love it, although I have no idea where I could ever possibly wear it. Maybe when you are a super famous movie star, I’ll wear it to one of your premieres.”  She gave him a little wink and a smile. “So what did you get?”

 

He held up a Burberry trench coat. “Something I cannot possibly accept.”

 

Sara laughed. “If you think my mother is going to take no for an answer, you’ve clearly not been paying attention. Try it on, I want to see.”

 

Tom put it on and buttoned it up over his jeans and t-shirt and Sara couldn’t help but marvel at how handsome and refined he looked.

 

“I love that on you. Very dapper. But you’ve missed a button.”

 

She approached him and began to adjust the buttons and he pulled her in to him, cupping her backside as he leaned in for a gentle kiss.

 

“I’m sorry but I couldn’t not kiss you when you look like that.”

 

Sara flashed him a playful grin. “So you like it then?”

 

“I love it. And I love you in it. And I would love you out of it…”

 

She felt his arousal begin to rise against her and pulled back.

 

“Thomas…”

 

“I know, I know. I’ll stop. It’s just… that dress… I think I might need to go have another long shower.”

 

She giggled. “Well don’t take too long in there this time. We’ve got to go soon.”

 

“Oh, I think it’ll be a quick one. I’ve got a lot more material to work from this time.”

 

He winked and wore a wicked grin as he left her room, closing the door behind him, and Sara felt her own arousal start to surge through her. She was so tempted to sneak into the shower with him again, but besides for the obvious fact that her parents were both milling about, she had already made the decision that she would only be causing herself more pain later if she gave in to her urges now. She decided on a cold shower, desperately trying to force all thoughts of Tom out of her head as she quickly prepared herself for dinner.

 

Once she was dressed and ready, she headed down the hall to the guest room and called out through the door.

 

“Almost ready?”

 

Tom opened the door, looking gorgeous as ever in just jeans and a near see-though t-shirt. She wanted desperately to run her hands up his chest and bury them in his still wet hair, to kiss him deeply and feel his desire stir against her body again, but she had to push those feelings away.

 

“How was your shower?”

 

“Very satisfying,” he replied with a naughty smirk. “I’ll meet you in the kitchen. I’ve just got to finish packing.”

 

Sara looked past him into the room and saw his things spread out around his luggage on the bed and she suddenly felt like she was about to have a total breakdown. The sight of the suitcase made it real. He was packing. He was leaving. She managed to say a cheerful “OK” before returning to her room and collapsing in a sobbing heap on her bed. Burying her head in her pillow, she tried to muffle the sound so no one heard her and when she finally pulled herself together she saw her perfectly made-up face had turned red and puffy with mascara and foundation running everywhere. She quickly redid herself and made her way to the kitchen. She felt a wreck on the inside, but at least she’d managed to set her outside straight.

 

It took all she had to put on a cheerful façade as they all walked a few blocks east to Jones Street. Tom seemed in good spirits, and she didn’t know whether he was just playing the part like she was or whether he really wasn’t as affected by his imminent departure as she was. She hoped it was the former and not the latter.

 

Once they reached Jones Street, Sara’s mom directed them to the appropriate spot and they walked arm in arm down the middle of the quiet side street, Sara’s head resting on Tom’s shoulder and gripping his arm tightly as she smiled for the camera.

 

“Perfect!” Alice said. “That is going to be adorable. Can’t wait to see how it turns out.”

 

She handed Sara the disposable camera they’d been using throughout the trip and she tucked it into her purse, and as they walked the remaining few blocks to the restaurant she mentally catalogued all the pictures they had taken. Part of her dreaded having those pictures developed because she knew by then Tom would be long gone, settling into his new life in London, and they would be all she had left of him. But another part of her was happy that she would always have a record of the magical week they spent together. She was so lost in thought with her conflicting emotions running wild in her mind that she didn’t even notice they’d arrived at the restaurant.

 

Sara was fairly catatonic during dinner. She sat next to Tom, who was deeply engaged in conversation with her father about RADA and what his plans were over the next few years. Sara tried to block it out, focusing on her Chianti and poking her food around on her plate. She had no appetite and had to choke down her dinner for appearances. She caught her mother’s eye across the table and Alice looked at her with deep concern. It was obvious her mother knew exactly how she was feeling, and she was both grateful and upset. Sara knew she would want to have a talk about it later, after Tom had left, and she just wasn’t ready. She felt like maybe she’d never be ready.

 

Before she knew it, it was time. Tom had gathered all his things and said his goodbyes to her parents and they stood together out on the street corner to wave down a cab to take him to the airport. He took her in his long arms and hugged her so tightly that she could barely breathe, exchanging no words because there was nothing left to say. They exchanged a lingering kiss, filled with love and sadness, each of them wondering if it would be their last. When they finally pried themselves away from each other, they were red-faced and dripping tears.

 

“I love you,” Tom said in a barely audible whisper. “I’m going to miss you so much I can barely stand to think about it. I don’t know what I’m going to do without you.”

 

Sara had no words left so she just nodded as she sniffled and sobbed. She finally managed to squeak out the words she needed to say to him.

 

“I love you, too. Always.”

 

An available taxi came roaring down 7th Avenue and Sara reluctantly waved it down. The cabbie popped the trunk and Tom placed his luggage inside, wiping his eyes. He returned to Sara, waiting on the curb.

 

“I’ve got to pull myself together here lest I look like a complete tit in front of the driver.”

 

Sara managed a half-hearted laugh, though she was dying inside. Tom pulled her tight into another hug.

 

“Call me when you get home? I don’t care what time it is.”

 

“Of course, darling. And you must send me doubles of those pictures once you get them printed.”

 

“I will.”

 

“Well, this is it, then, isn’t it?”

 

Sara just nodded in response, not capable of anything more. Neither of them wanted to say the word “goodbye” – goodbye was too permanent, goodbye meant an ending. So they said nothing at all. They just held each other until they were rudely interrupted by the cabbie honking his impatience. Tom kissed the bridge of her nose and looked deep into her eyes, the same way he had that night on the dock at the lake house. Only this time his eyes were filled with a love tinged with sadness instead of joy.

 

He got into the taxi and waved at her through the window as the driver sped off down 7th, and Sara stood on the corner watching the cab as it grew smaller and smaller and finally disappeared. She didn’t know how long she stood there after it was gone, but she felt rooted to the concrete and couldn’t drag herself away. She finally managed to make it back to the house, creeping quietly up the stairs and into her room to avoid a run-in with her mother, and when she entered she found one of Tom’s t-shirts laid out on her bed with a note.

 

_To my darling Sara,_

_For years you have tried, quite unsuccessfully, to steal this shirt from me. I want you to have it now. I want to know that a part of me is with you. I want to think of you falling asleep in it, looking angelic and beautiful, and dream I am there beside you. I don’t know when we’ll see each other next or what the future will bring for us, but know that in my heart I am always with you, and you with me._

_All my love – now and forever,_

_Tom_

 

Sara buried her face in the soft fabric of the shirt. His scent flooded her senses but she had no tears left to cry. She tried to lose herself in a book, and failing that a trashy magazine, but it was a hopeless endeavor. She gave up and grabbed a bottle of scotch and a glass from her father’s study and headed up to the roof deck, laying there for a long while, just watching the planes roar over the night sky of Manhattan, wondering which one was his.


	15. Chapter 15

_If it’s all the same to you, I’ll have that drink now._

 

The crowd roared with laughter and applause as the film came to a close and the credit sequence began. Sara leaned in to Tom, beaming with pride, and grabbed his arm, giving it a little squeeze.

 

“You were brilliant, as always.”

 

Brilliant was an understatement. Sara had seen all of Tom’s work over the years and was always blown away by how talented he was, but there was something about his portrayal of Loki that was on a whole other level. Though Tom himself couldn’t have been more different from the character, when he stepped in front of the camera he _was_ Loki, and despite the fact that he was the villain, she always found herself rooting for him. He brought such an incredible depth to the character that it was hard not to sympathize with him – not to mention the fact that seeing him in that costume, covered head-to-toe in leather and metal, really did things to her. He looked so fucking sexy in that thing – and the helmet… she was so turned on that she suddenly felt like she needed to excuse herself and get some air. Sitting next to him, flawless in his tux, while watching him on-screen, strutting around like a badass – it was too much.

 

“I’m gonna run to the ladies’ room.”

 

“Darling, one does not simply leave a Marvel film before the end credits.”

 

Sara knew there was more to come so she acquiesced, but when his name popped up in the credit sequence she reached her breaking point. She was so overwhelmed by all the racy thoughts that had flooded her mind during the film that she felt near dizzy with wanting him.  

 

“Tom, the movie was incredible. I’m sure I’ll see it a thousand more times. I’ve just really got to step out.”

 

She squeezed her way past the others, apologizing profusely to everyone as she passed. She felt like a complete fool leaving early, but her body was screaming at her to get out for a breather. She couldn’t possibly hold a conversation with anyone in her current state – especially any of Tom’s co-stars. She was already filled with nervous excitement to meet these people whose work she greatly admired, and she knew if she didn’t get her shit together she was going to come off looking like a bumbling idiot. She felt like she’d already made a terrible first impression with Luke, and she didn’t want a repeat of that situation with the likes of Robert Downey, Jr. and Scarlett Johanssson. She made her way to the ladies’ room and locked herself in one of the stalls.

 

Sara was floored by her complete inability to function in Tom’s presence. She had spent years trying to push her feelings for him out of her mind and focus on keeping their friendship alive despite the distance and they’d succeeded at doing so, but the key to that success was to bury all the feelings they had for one another. Since their week in New York all those years ago, they had never once spoken of what happened between them. Sara had felt that was the best, and probably the only way that they could remain close. At first, it was just too painful for her, so whenever she would talk to Tom on the phone or email with him (which was fairly frequently), she operated as if it was business as usual between them – just catching each other up on their lives and telling each other stories of random and/or ridiculous things. After a while, that just became their routine. The elephant in the room grew gradually smaller until it had all but disappeared. By the time Sara grew tired of New York and made the move to London, they were completely back to normal. When they were able to see each other, which wasn’t all that often given Tom’s busy schedule, they were able to go out for dinner and drinks, or catch a movie, or even spend a quiet night in together without any sort of tension.

 

Over the years they had always managed to dance around the topic of their romantic relationships, even though obviously they had both dated other people – some more seriously than others. They asked each other only the most perfunctory of questions, but the one exception to this unspoken rule came when Sara had gotten back together with Ed. She had left New York for a change of scenery to work on her novel, but she felt as if she was getting nowhere and that she may have made a huge mistake leaving her job and her life in New York behind. She felt like a consummate failure and fell into a funk that just happened to come as Tom’s star was rising. Despite how proud she was of him – and she was – she couldn’t help but revert to that old pattern of thinking: that she wasn’t good enough, that she’d never be good enough, that while it seemed like everyone around her was living out their dreams, she would never get there.

 

She was filled with self-loathing and regret, and though Tom had tried his best to keep her spirits up, always making himself available for late night calls filled with words of encouragement, when Ed popped back into her life, it had been all too easy to fall back into bad behaviors. Maybe she was punishing herself for her perceived shortcomings, or maybe she just didn’t want to be alone. She was fully aware that it was an ill-conceived decision and made no arguments to the contrary, but Tom had been absolutely furious and had not held back in expressing it. He told her she was an idiot for selling herself short; she told him he was an asshole for thinking he had the right to judge her. It was the one and only real fight they ever had.

 

But they got past it, because they always did, and Ed was out of the picture now – for good this time. Sara had caught him in bed with some 22-year-old swimsuit model and he’d made no attempt at an apology, instead running off and marrying her, leaving Sara single and happy about it. Tom was newly single as well, haven broken up with his longtime girlfriend not too long ago. But they’d been single at the same time before, and she had no clue why all of these feelings were suddenly boiling up and bubbling over now – and here of all places. She was filled to the brim with confusion and fear and excitement and desire, and she knew that if she didn’t pull it together soon, she was going to have to leave – and with Tom’s schedule booked solid with premieres and filming for upcoming projects, she had no idea when she’d be able to see him again.

 

Having finally gathered herself and exited the stall, she approached the wall of sinks and began to touch up her makeup in the mirror. She didn’t turn when she heard the door to the ladies room open behind her, but then she heard the sharp sound of the lock turning. She swung around to see Tom’s long frame leaning against the door. He had his hands thrust deep in his pockets and stood with his legs spread wide, grinning mischievously and looking at her like she was something delicious he couldn’t wait to try.

 

“Jesus, you scared me. What the fuck are you doing in here?”

 

He didn’t answer. He just strode toward her and grabbed her by the back of the neck, pulling her in to a sultry kiss. His hands traveled down her bare back and came to rest on her bottom before he pulled away, breathless.

 

“Darling, you know very well that I can’t not kiss you when you’re wearing that dress.” He leaned in to her, brushing her earlobe with his lips and whispering in a low growl. “I think you remember what it does to me.”

 

She should have forced him out of the ladies’ room and back into the crowd. She knew his absence would be noted and that, at any moment, some unsuspecting woman needing to use the restroom could come knocking at the door, suspicious as to why it was locked. But at that moment, she didn’t care. All of her confusion and fear had faded away with one kiss from his perfect lips.

 

She grabbed him by the waist and pulled him close to her, feeling his desire start to stir.

 

“Oh, I remember.”

 

She kissed him deeply, pawing at his hair and neck as his hands moved from her behind to her waist. He slowly gathered the fabric of her dress, inching it up from the floor until she stood completely exposed from the waist down but for her barely-there thong. Holding her dress up with one hand, he moved the other over the thin lace of her panties, sliding his fingers in between her legs. Her whole body tingled when he touched her there, and he moaned into her mouth when he felt how wet she was for him. He pushed the fabric aside and ran his middle finger up and down her entrance, teasing at her by dipping into her just the slightest bit. Feeling his touch again after so long, she went weak and had to lean back and grab the counter for balance.

 

He pulled himself away and, before she even knew what was happening, he had flung his jacket to the floor and returned to her, spinning her around and pinning her to the counter facing the mirror. He hiked up her dress again and plunged one hand inside the front of her underwear while the other fondled her breast. Her nipple strained against the thin green silk and she let out a low moan as he gently pinched it. She felt him harden against her backside as he dipped two fingers inside of her to wet them before moving them in quick, violent circles around her nub. He let his lightly bearded chin rest on her bare shoulder, his breathing ragged with lust as he nipped at her earlobe. Listening to the sounds coming out of him nearly drove her over the edge and she let her head fall back on to his shoulder, her eyes rolling back in her head while his fingers worked their magic. Suddenly he stopped, his hand stilled against her and applying more pressure as he whispered in her ear.

 

“Keep your eyes on the mirror, love. I want you to watch yourself come. I want you to see the image that haunts my dreams at night.”

 

He went back to work and she kept her eyes fixed squarely on the mirror, watching herself writhe in delicious agony as he moved her closer and closer to her release. She widened her stance and bent over onto the counter, pushing her backside into him and gripping the sink’s edge so hard her breasts heaved up and nearly popped out of her dress. Tom licked his lips as he noticed her ample flesh trying to free itself and took the opportunity to push the fabric of her dress down on one side, rolling her taut nipple between his thumb and forefinger as his other hand remained focus on her pleasure center. Her eyes locked onto his in the reflection and she bit down hard on her lip, trying to keep herself from crying out as he made her come hard and quick.

 

“Keep looking,” he whispered. “Watch yourself come for me.”

 

She saw herself shudder and convulse in waves as she rode out her climax, her mouth open and neck straining to keep herself quiet while he kept his fingers clamped down firmly over her sensitive flesh. As the aftershocks passed, he kissed gently up the side of her neck to her earlobe, whispering to her as he finally took his hand away.

 

“Do you see how beautiful you are, love? Do you understand why I can’t get you out of my head?”

 

She caught her breath and fumbled for words to respond as he shifted her to face him and pressed a long finger to her lips. She could taste herself on him as he silently shushed her.

 

“Say you’ll come home with me tonight. That’s all I need to hear – just one word. Please just say yes.”

 

She managed a near-breathless whisper.

 

“Yes.”

 

Tom grinned wickedly and picked his jacket up off the floor, straightening himself out in the mirror as she stood staring at him. He licked his fingers clean before running the sink. A smile crept onto her face as she found her words again.

 

“You are a naughty boy, Thomas.”

 

 “What else would you expect from the God of Mischief?”

 

He leaned in to grab a quick kiss before creeping out of the bathroom, somehow managing to go completely unnoticed, and Sara was left standing there, stunned by what had just happened but excited at the prospect of what might come next. Once she had gotten herself back together and fixed her makeup, she exited the bathroom and almost plowed headlong into Scarlett Johansson.

 

“There you are!” Scarlett yelled over the crowd noise. “I’ve been dying to meet you. I’m Scarlett.”

 

Sara was shocked to find that Scarlett, like Luke, had known who she was before a proper introduction.

 

“Sara Hughes, it’s lovely to meet you.”

 

She reached out to shake her hand but Scarlett grabbed her and went in for a light hug. It threw Sara for a bit of a loop but she just went with it. Tom had told her that Scarlett was super friendly, so she supposed it made sense she’d be a hugger.

 

“Tom has told us all such wonderful things about you. I’m happy to finally meet you. I was starting to think you weren’t real.”

 

Sara laughed nervously while Scarlett gave her a once over.

 

“Are you OK? You look flushed.”

 

Sara tried to keep her composure and fumbled for an excuse.

 

“It’s nothing. I’m fine. I think this dress is just a bit too tight.”

 

“Oh, honey, you think that’s bad – try kicking Renner’s ass in a catsuit. I’m just gonna pop into the ladies room for a sec, but I’ll see you at the after party, OK? I want to hear embarrassing Tom stories and I’m sure you’ve got loads.”

 

“Sure thing,” Sara said, happy Scarlett took her dress excuse at face value. “I’ll see you later.”

 

Sara made her way through the crowd, silently praising her genetics for making her so short. She was hoping to avoid another run-in like the one she’d just had. Not that it went poorly, but it was obvious, given Scarlett’s comment, that she had not sufficiently recovered from her interlude with Tom in the bathroom – clearly she needed a bit more time to get herself right. But, as Tom always said, God laughs at your plans, and she made it no more than twenty feet when she walked right into Tom, huddled in a circle laughing with Chris Hemsworth and his wife.

 

“Here she is now,” Tom said, beaming down at her. “Chris, Elsa, this is my darling Sara.”

 

Chris and Elsa both hugged her as they made their introductions, and she was starting feel like the movie’s codename “Group Hug” was quite possibly the most appropriate moniker ever given. Like Scarlett before him, Chris went on about how happy he was to finally meet her. Sara knew that he and Tom had grown very close since they worked on _Thor_ and, more than anyone else, she had wanted to make a good impression on Chris. They chatted for a bit about this and that and Chris and Elsa were being exceptionally sweet to her, occasionally casting sidelong glances at each other when they thought she wasn’t looking. Sara began to wonder just how much they knew about her relationship with Tom, and as the conversation continued she grew increasingly convinced that Chris knew _everything_.

 

What followed was a whirlwind of introductions. In the span of about ten minutes, she had met the entire cast, and each of them treated her with such kindness and conversed with her, however briefly, as if they’d known her for years. It was an odd feeling – not exactly uncomfortable, because everyone was incredibly kind and inviting, but strange in that she felt like, even though they were the celebrities, they knew more about her than she knew about them. She tried her best to just run with it all, smiling and laughing at Tom’s side, but as the minutes wore on she found herself craving a drink to take the edge off.

 

She was happy when Luke arrived to tell Tom it was time to head over to the party. They said their goodbyes to Elsa, who was understandably exhausted and wanting to go to bed. Chris said he would meet them out later, wanting to escort his very-pregnant wife safely back to their hotel.

 

“Alright, then, shall we?” Tom asked, holding out his arm.

 

“Absolutely,” Sara replied. “I could use a nice single malt right about now.”

 

“Why? Is everything alright, darling? I thought that went quite well.”

 

“Oh, everything’s fine. It’s all just a bit… overwhelming. Meeting everyone at once like this. I’m sure a stiff drink will do the trick.”

 

Tom smiled wickedly. “Well if it’s something stiff you’re after, I’ve got just the thing.”

 

Sara buried her head behind her clutch purse and whispered, “Thomas, if you keep up like that we’re not going to make it to the party.”

 

He just laughed as he took her hand, guiding her through the crowd and out towards the waiting car.

 

The party was in full swing when they got there, and she could barely hear Tom over the din of chatter and bumping bass. A waiter passed by with a tray of champagne and Sara snagged a glass, downing it in one gulp.

 

“Much better,” she said with a smile, eliciting Tom’s signature giggle as he put his arm around her waist.

 

“Shall we make the rounds, then?”

 

Sara’s feet were absolutely killing her and all she wanted was to get another drink and park herself at a table somewhere.

 

“Tom, I think I need to sit down for a bit. I made a poor shoe choice.”

 

She popped her foot out of one shoe and showed him the nasty blister that had formed on her heel.

 

“Oh, love, why didn’t you say something sooner? Let’s find you a seat and I’ll go in search of a nice bottle of something.”

 

He led her over to a large booth where Scarlett and Jeremy were seated, talking closely and laughing. Tom deposited her next to Scarlett and leaned over the table to the pair.

 

“Alright, I’m leaving Sara in your care whilst I rustle up a nice single malt. Try not to frighten her off, will you?”

 

“Perfect!” Scarlett cried out. “Jeremy and I were just talking about how much alcohol we’d need to ply her with to get her to spill some dirt on you, Hiddleston.” She turned to Sara. “I’m not buying the perfect gentleman routine – he has to have some flaws.”

 

Sara laughed. “If I find one, you’ll be the first person I tell.”

 

She got on really well with Scarlett and Jeremy while Tom was gone. Sara thought they would make an adorable couple and found herself wondering if they really were just friends. After all, she knew better than anyone what “just friends” could mean. Tom soon returned, proudly brandishing a bottle of Balvenie.

 

“Look what I found,” he said, grinning down at her.

 

Without thinking she responded, “Well that’s appropriate.”

 

Scarlett pounced on the comment. “Oh, there’s definitely a story behind that and I want to know what it is.”

 

She just shook her head as Tom sidled next to her in the booth, resting his long arm behind her. He acted amused by Scarlett’s persistent nagging, but Sara could tell the question made him nervous.

 

“Nope. Sorry. There’s not enough alcohol at this party to get me to tell that one.”

 

Scarlett was intrigued and clearly in a playful mood. “We’ll see about that.” She slapped her on the thigh. “Drink up, lady.”

 

Jeremy chuckled. “I’m going to apologize in advance for how annoying Scarlett is going be tonight.”

 

Scarlett swatted him on the arm and told him to shut the fuck up. Sara liked her already.

 

A few drinks and a lot of laughs later, Tom spotted a group of people he hadn’t yet had a chance to speak with and excused himself.

 

“Sorry, darling, but I’ve got to go put in an appearance over there. I’ll be back soon. Hopefully by then you’ll be pissed enough to agree to a dance.”

 

He darted away from the booth and made his way through the crowd before she could protest and Scarlett leaned in to her. “He’s a phenomenal dancer, although I’m sure you already know that.”

 

“Scarlett likes to bump and grind with him, but I prefer a nice waltz,” Jeremy quipped, taking a sip of his beer. “He never lets me lead, though.”

 

Sara nearly spat out her drink and she and Scarlett began to laugh uncontrollably.

 

“So,” Scarlett asked once she’d caught her breath, “you’re coming with us, right?”

 

“Coming with you where?”

 

Jeremy shot Scarlett a look and she slapped her forehead. “Oh, shit. He hasn’t asked her yet.”

 

“Nice one, Scar.”

 

“Fuck. Forget I said anything.”

 

Sara was confused. “Wait, what are you guys talking about?”

 

Just then Tom returned to the table, almost as if he could sense that their conversation had taken an odd turn. He held out his hand to her.

 

“May I have this dance? Or can you still not bear to stand in those?”

 

Sara’s feet still ached and the though of putting her heels back on was horrifying, but the mood at the table had turned a bit awkward after Scarlett’s comment and she thought it best she leave.

 

“The booze has dulled the pain,” she lied. “Lead the way.”

 

As he walked her over to the dance floor she tried and failed to mask her pain, but Tom took one look at her and could tell she was hurting.

 

“You liar.”

 

“I’m sorry, Tom. I want to dance with you but I just can’t.”

 

“Why didn’t you just tell me that at the table?”

 

Sara hesitated as she tried to think of a plausible excuse, but Tom could tell she was hiding something.

 

“Something happened while I was gone. What was it?”

 

“It was nothing, Tom. Just drop it.”

 

“No, tell me.”

 

He was looking at her with those perfectly blue eyes of his and she knew she was powerless to resist that gaze, so she was beyond grateful when Chris popped up and clapped Tom on the shoulder.

 

“Hey, mate. What’d I miss?”

 

Tom turned around and gave him a hug, and Sara laughed internally at the extent of their bromance.

 

“Not much. The usual drinking and dancing – except for this one.” Tom gestured at Sara. “She keeps refusing me despite my best efforts to get her out on the dance floor.”

 

“Tom, you try dancing in 3-inch heels and then talk to me.”

 

“I’ve actually seen him do that,” Chris japed. “He’s shockingly good.”

 

Tom and Chris proceeded to mock each other for a bit before Tom suggested they go back to the table. Sara breathed a small sigh of relief to find that Scarlett and Jeremy had moved to the dance floor, and she sat happily listening to Tom and Chris tell stories about the many pranks they played on one another over the course of filming _Thor_ and _Avengers_. Tom was particularly proud of the time he managed to abscond with both Mjolnir and the Captain America shield.

 

“Joss was about ready to strangle me that day,” Tom said with a self-satisfied smile, “but it was totally worth it. Will you two excuse me for a moment? I need to run to the loo.”

 

Tom jetted off and Chris turned to Sara, his face suddenly quite serious.

 

“He misses you, you know. Don’t tell him I said that, but it’s true.”

 

Sara looked up at him quizzically. “How much has he told you?”

 

“Enough.”

 

She sighed, knowing there was no point in playing dumb. “I miss him, too. I really do. But what can I do? He’s never here.” She took a deep gulp of her scotch, savoring the burn. “How do you and Elsa do it?”

 

“When you love someone, you make it work. It’s not easy, but then nothing worthwhile ever is.” He took a sip of his drink and scanned the room for Tom before leaning in to her. “You should give it a go. See what happens. You’ll regret it if you don’t. I know he does.”

 

Sara was about to grill Chris on what he meant by that when Tom returned to the table. He had long since abandoned his jacket, and had loosed his bowtie and unbuttoned his dress shirt to reveal just the tiniest patch of chest hair. Something about the way he stood there, slightly dressed down and disheveled while still looking impeccable, made her ache with desire. She wanted him so badly she forgot Chris was even sitting there until he cleared his throat and spoke.

 

“Well, it’s getting late and I should get back to the wife. See you in Rome, mate. Sara, it was wonderful to finally meet you. Hope I’ll be seeing you again soon.”

 

They hugged goodbye and Chris gave her a knowing smile as he excused himself. When he was gone, Tom turned to her with lust-hooded eyes. He placed his hand on her thigh under the table, inching it slowly upward as he leaned in and whispered in her ear.

 

“Fancy a nightcap?”

 

Her body was humming and all the doubts she’d just voiced to Chris were wiped from her memory. Without a word, she took his hand and he led her toward the exit. She paused before they reached the door, looking back at the room full of people.

 

“Don’t you have to say your goodbyes first?”

 

“Darling, the only thing in this world I care about is getting you back to my flat and out of that dress.” He licked his lips as he took in the sight of her. “I’ve been waiting for this since the first day I met you.”

 

Sara laughed. “Thomas, I think you’re forgetting a certain night spent at the lake.”

 

“Oh, I remember every second of it, love.” He leaned in and purred softly in her ear. “But I made love to you that night. Tonight, I’m going to fuck you.”


	16. Chapter 16

Tom couldn’t keep his hands off of her on the drive back to his flat, and Sara found herself having to repeatedly push him away. As much as she wanted him, the car offered no privacy and she wasn’t about to put on a show. With the exception of one particularly steamy kiss she couldn’t bear to break away from, she managed to keep him at bay until they arrived. As the driver sped off, he turned to her, his face flushed red with desire.

“I thought we’d never get here,” he said, giving her bottom a firm squeeze as he guided her toward the door. “Another second in that car and I would have gone completely mad.”

He grew flustered as he dug around in his pockets.

“Oh bloody hell, Luke still has my keys.”

Sara reached into her purse and pulled out her keychain, jingling it in front of Tom’s face.

“Well it’s a good thing you left your spares in capable hands.”

He snatched them away from her and fumbled with the lock, his impatience to get her inside rendering him all but incapable of opening his own front door. When he finally managed to get it open, Sara stepped inside and felt instantly at ease. Even though the premiere experience had been exciting, she had felt a quiet discomfort all night. She lived a generally simple life and was most definitely not used to that sort of pomp and circumstance, and when she entered Tom’s flat all her tension melted away. She felt at home there, and despite the fact that she hadn’t been inside for well over a year, it was someplace familiar and comfortable to her. Part of that, of course, had to do with Tom – it was very him – and being there together, alone at last after the evening’s insanity, filled her with a much-needed sense of tranquility. She looked at Tom with calm in her eyes.

“I’ve missed this place.”

He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close to him.

“And it’s missed you.” He leaned in and kissed her gently. “But I’ve missed you more. Now take off those ridiculous shoes and get your luscious ass upstairs.”

“Your wish is my command.”

He smiled lasciviously down at her. “Careful, darling. I might hold you to that.”

Sara heaved a sigh of relief as she discarded her heels and plopped down on Tom’s oversize leather sofa.

“Fuck these shoes,” she said, taking a glass of wine from Tom’s outstretched hand. “I’m never wearing them again as long as I live.”

“Well, I’d be lying if I said they weren’t sexy, but seeing as they kept me from having a dance with you, I have to concur.”

Her scalp was starting to ache from her updo so she removed the few pins keeping her hair in place. Tom watched as she let it fall in copper waves down her shoulders and wet his lips as he murmured his approval.

“I had almost forgotten how lovely your hair is let down.”

She smiled up at him and took a sip of her wine. As she went to place her glass on the side table, she caught sight of her novel sitting atop a pile of newspapers. She had a copy intended for him sitting at her flat, but the hardcover was too cumbersome to bring to the premiere. She had planned on bringing it to him the next day, before he left for Rome.

“Tom, why the hell did you buy a copy? I have one for you at home.”

“You honestly expected me to wait for the most eagerly-anticipated work of fiction I’ve ever wanted to get my hands on? I bought it the day it came out, although I’m afraid I haven’t yet had the time to finish. I’m about half through so no spoilers.”

He flashed her a knowing glance, remembering a promise made long ago, and he knelt down in front of her on the couch with a smug smile on his perfect face. She buried her face in her hands.

“Oh, God. Don’t do it.”

“Sorry, darling, but I’ve been waiting for about a decade to say this so let me have my moment of glory here with no interruptions.” He cleared his throat and took a long, drawn out pause as he inched closer to her, torturing her with his rakish charm as he dragged out the moment as long as he possibly could. His face was less than an inch from hers when he finally broke into a wicked grin.

“I told you so.”

Sara rolled her eyes instinctively. “Tom, really, it’s not even…”

He pushed back from her. “Stop right there. Just stop. I’ll have none of your self-deprecating shit tonight. It’s brilliant. You’re brilliant. Now kindly shut up and raise your glass.”

Sara sighed as she lifted her glass from the table.

“To you, darling. There are no words to describe how extraordinarily proud I am of you. I am so blessed to have you in my life. May all your dreams come true, now and forever.”

She touched her glass to his with a light clink, smiling at him in spite of herself.

“Thank you, Tom. For everything. Really. I would not be where I am today if it weren’t for you.”

She grabbed the book off the table, curious to see where he was in the story, and when she flipped to his bookmarked page she found a photograph. It was tattered around the edges and a bit faded from use, but the image was clear – their youthful, smiling faces stared back at her from a quiet side street in New York City. He took the picture from her hands and smiled down at it like he was viewing it for the first time, though every curve and shadow had long since been ingrained in his mind.

“It’s been my bookmark for years. Settling in with a good book always makes me think of you.”

She choked back the tears she felt start to well up, and felt her heart swell with a lifetime’s worth of love for him. She knew she would have given up long ago if it wasn’t for his unwavering love and support. He had believed in her from the very start, when she’d had no faith in herself, and he had been there to see her through her bleakest hours – even if only from afar. Even kept locked away in some deep recess of her mind, her love for him, and his for her, had always carried her through the dark times. And there he was, right within reach, at once beaming with pride and aching with desire – and all of it for her. She mourned the years she’d lost thinking it could never work between them and rued the day she had let him go.

She set her glass down on the table and pulled him into an ardent kiss, letting her lips speak for her. Their mouths moved heatedly against each other as Tom buried his hands in her hair, lightly tracing her lower lip with his tongue before nipping at it. It was the kind of kiss she’d longed for – the kind that makes the rest of the world fade to inconsequence. Tom pulled away, breathless, and implored her.

“Dance with me.”

She smiled her assent as he pulled her up off the couch and into his arms, pecking gently at her lips before crossing the room to fiddle with his iPod. When he returned to her she heard the familiar notes of Bob Dylan’s harmonica pour from the speakers as “Sara” began to play. He took her gently in his arms and she placed her head on his chest, feeling the heat come off his bare skin where his shirt was unbuttoned. Eyes closed and bodies entwined, they swayed rhythmically to the melody as Dylan sang tribute to the love of his life.

_Sara, Sara_   
_Whatever made you want to change your mind_   
_Sara, Sara_   
_So easy to look at, so hard to define_

She raised her head from it’s resting place and their eyes locked as he ran one hand gently down her back, dancing her in a slow circle as she caressed his neck.

_Sara, Sara_   
_Sweet virgin angel, sweet love of my life_   
_Sara, Sara_   
_Radiant jewel, mystical wife_

He disentwined her hand from his, bringing it up to his shoulder as he pulled her in closer. She ran her hand through his hair as he leaned down and pressed his cheek to hers, singing softly in her ear.

_Sara, Sara_   
_It’s all so clear, I could never forget_   
_Sara, Sara_   
_Loving you is the one thing I’ll never regret_

His voice, honey-smooth and melodious, sent chills running through her and the rest of the lyrics were drowned out by the sound of her own heartbeat. He slowly moved his lips to meet hers and kissed her deeply, his tender love quickly giving way to carnal desire. Hiking her dress up to her waist, he lifted her effortlessly off the ground and carried her to the bedroom, never once taking his mouth from hers. He threw her roughly onto the bed and pounced on her, sliding his hands over the soft silk of her dress as he growled in her ear.

“Take it off. Now.”

She flashed him a wicked smile. “Your wish is my command.”

He stood by the side of the bed, watching her as she slipped the thin straps off her shoulders. The dress was skin-tight and she struggled as she tried to pull it down over her breasts. Finally, with a hard tug, she freed herself and Tom’s breath hitched as he took in the sight of her ample chest. His desire surged through him and he bent over her, yanking the dress down and off her in one smooth motion, and her underwear with it. His pants grew tight as he drank in the sight of her naked body, but as always he was drawn to her face. She gazed up at him, her green eyes darkened with lust.

“What do you want, Tom?” she asked, her voice breathy and seductive in a way he’d never heard before. “Tell me what you want.”

He smiled devilishly down at her as she submitted to him.

“I’m wearing too many clothes, love. Take them off.”

She raised herself off the bed and stood in front of him, running her hand along the swell of his trousers, and he let out a guttural moan as she palmed him through the fabric. She yanked his shirt out of his pants and started fingering the buttons.

“Are you fond of this shirt?”

“Not particularly.”

“Good.”

She grabbed it with both hands and ripped it open, sending buttons careening across the floor as she slid it off his shoulders and rubbed her hands down over the smooth skin of his abdomen. He had never been so turned on in all his life and he bit his lip as she knelt before him, slowly undoing his belt buckle. She brought her mouth down and dragged her lower lip over the bulge in his pants, her ragged breath hot against his skin through the fabric. She looked up at him with a playful smile as she grabbed his ass, squeezing it hard as she deftly undid his pants button with her teeth and tongue. She took his zipper between her teeth and inched it all the way down, taking hold of his waistband and removing his pants and boxer-briefs in one smooth motion.

She took a sharp breath as his massive erection sprung free. She hadn’t forgotten how big he was, but the memory was nothing compared to the reality. She wanted him inside her so badly she could barely stand it but she kept quiet, looking up at him and waiting for instruction.

He grabbed her by the underarms and tossed her back onto the bed, wetting his lips as he watched her breasts bounce on impact. He stood over her, running one hand up and down his length as the other pushed her legs apart and teased at her center.

“So wet for me already, darling,” he said, rubbing his fingers over her slick folds. “But I can make you wetter. Get on your knees and bend over.”

He crawled onto the bed next to her and flipped over, laying flat on his back and positioning her so she was straddling him backwards. He grabbed her by the thighs and pulled her toward his face.

“Sit.”

She lowered herself onto him slowly and groaned long and deep as she felt his tongue lick her up and down before entering her. He alternated between sucking at her sweet flesh and tonguing her and she fell forward, writhing in ecstasy on top of him as he devoured her. She grabbed his shaft and took him deep in her mouth, and as they moaned their pleasure onto each other the vibrations set their bodies humming in unison.

He took his hands from her thighs and moved them to her backside, his fingers gripping deep into her plentiful flesh before he took one hand away and brought it down swift and hard on her ass. She took her mouth off him and gasped with shock and pleasure. She could feel him grinning against her as he paused.

“You like it rough, don’t you, you naughty girl?”

“Oh, God yes. Don’t stop.”

He slapped her again, harder this time, and she cried out. His long fingers clamped down on her thigh, holding her steady as he smacked her three more times in rapid succession. He grunted as each forceful blow left her flesh redder and redder. Suddenly he stopped and flipped her over onto her back, prying her legs apart and kneeling in between them as he stared down at her, beautiful and disheveled and panting with lust.

“Are you ready for me, darling?”

She couldn’t even speak so she just nodded. He shook his head and laughed.

“How unfortunate.”

He leaned over and took her breast into his mouth, teasing at her nipple with his tongue and teeth before kissing his way over to its twin. He trailed a line down her stomach with his finger and ran his hand up and down her folds before plunging two fingers inside her, swirling them deep as she opened up for him. He found her sweet spot as his thumb circled her clit and she started to shudder and moan under his touch.

“Come for me, darling. I want to hear you scream.”

He worked her violently, his muscles straining as his fingers pumped in and out of her with inhuman speed. She felt all the blood rush to her center as she tightened around him and came screaming, his name on her lips as she rode out her climax on his fingers. Once satisfied she’d finished, he crawled on top of her and grabbed her ankles, spreading her legs as wide as they’d go as he positioned himself at her entrance.

“Now you’re ready. I’m going to fuck you so hard you’ll forget your own name.”

He plunged himself into her with an animal grunt that almost made her come again right then and there. He showed her no mercy, slamming into her from tip to hilt and pounding her hard into the mattress. Without losing pace, he threw her legs onto his shoulders and she gripped his neck with her ankles as the new position tightened her around him. He fell forward onto her and dug his fingers deep into her hips, pulling her into him as he fucked her hard and deep, groaning and grunting as beads of sweat fell from his brow onto her bare chest. Suddenly he stopped and pulled out.

“Turn around.”

She did as he commanded and flipped herself over on all fours. He moaned as he slid his tip up and down her entrance before sliding inside her gently, gripping her hips as he moved her up and down on his shaft – slowly at first, but then with increasing speed and voracity. He pushed himself into her to the hilt and let go of her hips, staying motionless inside her as her leaned over to growl his demands in her ear.

“Your turn, darling. Fuck me. Hard.”

She was so turned on she could barely breathe. She steadied herself as she pushed back onto him, sliding herself up and down his throbbing length. The sounds coming out of him were inhuman and making her so hot she couldn’t help but glance back at him over her shoulder. She saw him standing stock still, his hands gripping his hair and his head thrown back, his mouth forming a perfect O. Just seeing the pleasure she was bringing him was enough to send her over the edge again, and she slammed onto him hard as she screamed his name over and over.

“Oh, fuck, I’m so close. I love it when you scream my name. Don’t stop.”

He grabbed her by the hips and hammered her, feeling the tingling heat rising up in his groin as he listened to her yell his name and plead for him to come. Ready to burst, he grabbed a fistful of her hair and stilled himself as he came roaring into her, shuddering on top of her as he filled her. He kissed a line up her back to her neck until he couldn’t hold himself up anymore and fell in a heap on the bed beside her. Both were silent but for their beating hearts and ragged breathing as they stared up at the ceiling. Sara spoke first.

“Tom, that was… I don’t even know what that was.”

He laughed and kissed the tip of her nose.

“There are no words for what that was, darling.”

She giggled back at him. “I need water or I might die. Don’t get up. I’ll bring you some. You’ve earned it.”

She walked to the bathroom and gulped down three glasses of water in a row. She smiled as she looked at herself in the mirror: one butt cheek was branded with a hand-shaped red mark and fingertip-sized bruises peppered her thighs and hips. She filled the glass up again to bring it out to Tom, but when she came out of the bathroom he was lying back on the bed, miraculously hard again and stroking himself slowly. He let out a low chuckle.

“Darling, if you can still walk, we’re not done yet.”

He had her every which way as the night wore on – rough and dirty, loving and tender – and by the time they were thoroughly spent the sun was rising and Sara had lost track of how many times she’d come. They slept soundly in each other’s arms and by the time Sara woke it was late afternoon. Tom’s flight to Rome for the next premiere was set to take off in a few short hours and, as she watched him sleeping angelic next to her, her mind traveled back to the day he left New York. She promised herself she wouldn’t make the same mistake twice.

She leaned over and kissed his forehead. “Rise and shine.”

He rose gently, and Sara laughed at how adorably confused he looked when he first woke up.

He leaned over and cupped her face, kissing her gently. “Good morning, my angel.”

“Good afternoon, you mean. It’s already 4 o’clock.”

He jumped up with a start.

“Oh, God, is it really? I’m sure Luke has left me near a thousand messages by now.”

“Yeah you should probably start getting your shit together. You’ve only got a few hours before your flight.”

He turned to her with a nervous look in his eyes.

“Yes, about that. I was going to ask you last night but, well, certain things took precedence.”

Sara remembered Scarlett’s slip-up from the night before and suddenly she knew what he was about to say.

“I want you to come with me – to Rome, to Berlin. Everywhere.”

“Tom…”

He grabbed her face and looked at her with a seriousness she’d never seen.

“I don’t want to be without you anymore. I can’t. I love you, so deeply and so completely. The last time I left without you it was as if the light had gone out of my life. I won’t make the same mistake twice, Sara. Just please say you’ll come.”

Sara started to cry. They were happy tears, tinged with confusion.

“I love you, too. I really do. And I want this to work, but I can’t come with you. I can’t just drop everything and jet around with you. I have a life here.”

He sighed. “I thought you might say that.”

“Well what else can I say? If you love me, you know I’m not the type to drop my entire life on a dime.”

He ran his fingers through his hair and looked down, lost in thought, trying desperately to think of something he could say to change her mind.

“Darling, I want to be with you. If you can’t come with me, fine. I understand. It was presumptuous of me to think you’d just jet off with me with no notice and I’m sorry, but…”

“Don’t apologize, Tom. I would love nothing more than to go with you, but I just can’t right now. It’s not a good time for me. I have a meeting with my editor tomorrow, there’s promotional shit to do…”

“I know, and I didn’t mean to make you feel like my career is more important than yours. Oh, God, I must sound like such a selfish prick. I’m so sorry.”

“Thomas, stop apologizing. I know you. You would never think that way. That’s why I love you.”

He looked at her, his eyes desperate and pleading.

“If you love me then be with me. I can’t go through this again.”

Sara sniffled, trying to stop the tears from falling, and Tom wiped her face clean.

“I can’t go through it again either. It near killed me the first time.” She pulled herself together and managed a half smile. “I want to be with you, Tom. I always have. But I don’t know where we go from here.”

They sat in silence for a while, both of them searching for a solution to an impossible problem. Sara thought back to her conversation with Chris the night before, and suddenly felt like maybe the only solution to be had was to accept that there wasn’t one. The tears stopped flowing and she looked at Tom and smiled.

“Oh, fuck it. Let’s give it a go.”

Tom looked like he’d been hit by a truck.

“What are you saying?”

“What I’m saying is that I’m sick of living with regret. What I’m saying is that I love you and you love me and that should be enough.”

He grabbed her and hugged her tight to him, determined not to let her go. When he pulled away to face her, she’d never seen him look happier.

“It is more than enough. It’s the only thing in this world that truly matters. All the success, fame, fortune – it’s all rubbish. Life is meaningless if you’ve got no one to share it with. I want to share my life with you. I want us to build a life together. We’ll just have to figure it out as we go.”

Sara smiled at him and ran her hand through his hair. She believed every word he said and trusted him completely – with her heart, with her life. She knew then that, no matter what happened, he would do anything it took to try to build a life with her, and she felt the same.

“You know, a very tall, very blonde Australian man once told me that when you love someone, you make it work. It’s not easy, but nothing worthwhile ever is. Of course I have no fucking clue how we will make it work, but I think we owe it to ourselves to try, don’t you?”

“Yes, love,” he said, leaning in for a kiss. “I do.”


	17. Epilogue

Tom phoned Sara from Berlin a few days later. He sounded happy, but tired.

 

“Jesus, Tom, you sound exhausted. How are you feeling?”

 

“I’m practically delirious. I haven’t the slightest clue what time zone I’m in, I’ve barely slept for a week, and I miss you desperately. Have you spoken with your editor?”

 

“Yes, I talked to him today. I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that we can’t move the book signing so I won’t be able to come to New York for the premiere.”

 

“Damn. I was hoping we could meet up with your parents and tell them in person.”

 

“I know, me too, believe me. My mother’s head is going to explode and I need to be there to see it. There was just no getting out of it. But all hope is not lost there.”

 

“Why? What’s the good news, then?”

 

“The good news is that that I was able to push everything else back a week, so if you want I could fly to New York and meet you the day after. We could tell my parents then. Or we could go on holiday somewhere else. Whatever you want to do.”

 

“All I want is to be with you. I don’t care where in the world we are.” He paused. “But I do have a thought…”

 

Sara knew instinctively what he was about to say and was grinning ear-to-ear on her end of the phone.

 

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

 

“I’ll meet you at the lake house, darling.”


End file.
